Thoreau Pondering Quotes

I began looking at thoughtful quotes from a multitude of great thinkers of the past, and as I was looking at Thoreau’s quotes, they kept pulling me in and in—he has some amazing things to say that can impact your life. Take time to ponder these quotes that make you think:

“Happiness is like a butterfly; the more you chase it, the more it will elude you. But if you turn you attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.” 

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“Do not hire a man who does your work for money, but him who does it for love of it.”

“We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aid, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn.”

“The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when one asked me what I thought, and attended to my answer.”

“If a man walks in the woods for love of them half of each day, he is in danger of being regarded as a loafer. But if he spends his days as a speculator, shearing off those woods and making the earth bald before her time, he is deemed an industrious and enterprising citizen.”

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”

“I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual.”

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“The universe is wider than our views of it.”

“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”

“It is what a man thinks of himself that really determines his fate.”

“Things do not change; we change.”

“Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.”

“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find eternity in each moment.”

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“Wealth is the ability to fully experience life.”

“Though I do not believe that a plant will spring up where no seed has been, I have great faith in a seed…Convince me that you have a seed there, and I am prepared to expect wonders.”

“There will never be a reality free and enlightened State until the State comes to recognize the individual as a higher and independent power, from which all its own power and authority are derived, and treats him accordingly.”

“What is called genius is the abundance of life and health.”

“It is not enough to be busy. So are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?”

“In the long run, men hit only what they aim at. Therefore, they had better aim at something high.”

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“Nay, be a Columbus to whole new continents and worlds within you, opening new channels, not of trade, but of thought.”

“The Artist is he who detects and applies the law from observation of the works of genius, whether of man or Nature. The artisan is he who merely applies the rules which others have detected.”

“To a philosopher all news, as it is called, is gossip, and they who edit and read it are old women over their tea.”

“Why should we be in such desperate haste to succeed, and in such desperate enterprises? If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.”

“Never look back unless you are planning to go that way.” 

“It is better to have your head in the clouds, and know where you are…than to breathe the clearer atmosphere below them, and think you’re in paradise.” 

“A man cannot be said to succeed in this life who does not satisfy one friend.”

“The only obligation which I have a right to assume is to do at any time what I think right.”

“Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul.”

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“Read the best books first, or you may not have a chance to read them at all.”

“The perception of beauty is a moral test.”

“It is never too late to give up our prejudices.”

“Our houses are such unwieldy property that we are often imprisoned rather than housed by them.”

“If you can speak what you will never hear, if you can write what you will never read, you have done rare things.”

“The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.”

“A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone.”

“If you would convince a man that he does wrong, do right. Men will believe what they see.”

“Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.”

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“Books can only reveal us to ourselves, and as often as they do us this service we lay them aside.”

“There is no more fatal blunderer than he who consumes the greater part of his life getting his living.”

“Instead of noblemen, let us have noble villages of men.”

“That government is best which governs least.”

“If the machine of government is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law.”

“So thoroughly and sincerely are we compelled to live, reverencing our life, and denying the possibility of change. This is the only way, we say; but there are as many ways as there can be drawn radii from one centre. All change is a miracle to contemplate; but it is a miracle which is taking place every instant.”

“The smallest seed of faith is better than the largest fruit of happiness.”

“That man is rich whose pleasures are the cheapest.”

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”None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm.”

“To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts.”

“If a man constantly aspires is he not elevated?”

“The youth gets together his materials to build a bridge to the moon, or, perchance, a palace or temple on the earth, and, at length, the middle-aged man concludes to build a woodshed with them.”

“As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness.”

“To be awake is to be alive.”

“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.”

“Live your beliefs and you can turn the world around.”

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“In human intercourse the tragedy begins, not when there is misunderstanding about words, but when silence is not understood.”

“There is no value in life except what you choose to place upon it and no happiness in any place except what you bring to it yourself.”

“A truly good book teaches me better than to read it. I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint. What I began by reading, I must finish by acting.”

“Live the Life you’ve dreamed”

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“When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest.”

“I have always been regretting that I was not as wise as the day I was born.”

“I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor.”

“Most of the luxuries and many of the so-called comforts of life are not only not indispensable, but positive hindrances to the elevation of mankind.”

“Books are the treasured wealth of the world and the fit inheritance of generations and nations.”

“Nature is full of genius, full of the divinity; so that not a snowflake escapes its fashioning hand.”

“Disobedience is the true foundation of liberty. The obedient must be slaves.”

“Do not trouble yourself much to get new things, whether clothes or friends…Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts.”

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Painting by John Latermilch of Thoreau

Other good Thoreau Quotes:

“How could youths better learn to live than by at once trying the experiment of living?”

“Every generation laughs at old fashions, but follows religiously the new.”

“In wilderness is the preservation of the world.”

“It is the greatest of all advantages to enjoy no advantages at all.”

“The language of excitement is at best picturesque merely. You must be calm before you can utter oracles.”

“Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow, but tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh.”

“‘Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?

“Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.”

“Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.”

“How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live.”

“Men have become the tools of their tools.”

“Men are born to succeed, not to fail.”

“Til healthy to be sick sometimes.”

“Generally speaking, a howling wilderness does not howl: it is the imagination of the traveler that does the howling.”

 

I’m sure I have left out some great ones. Which is your favorite? Please share any thoughtful quotes in the comments.

4 Philosophy ideas that can bring you temporary peace

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Disclaimer—This might change your perspective on life. Hopefully for the better. 

The choice is yours.

The 4 philosophy ideas I discuss stem from a philosophy called stoicism.

I wanted to title this post: “Stoicism 101; an old philosophy that can liberate you,” but I’m not sure if many people have heard about stoicism, and I know most people have heard of philosophy.

So what is stoicism? (scroll down to ‘4 Main Points‘ section for just the main points if you’d like).

Stoicism is defined as: “The endurance of pain or hardship without a display of feelings and without complaint.”

It is being okay with everything that happens & accepting how you feel.  It is focusing on what you can control, and letting go of the rest.  

Stoicism is liberating.

Stoicism can help you: 

  • Become a better person & friend
  • Deal with people & external events appropriately
  • Deal with adversity
  • Maintain a level head through praise & criticism
  • Come to peace with death
  • Overcome destructive emotions, and many more.

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Stoicism is also defined as: “An ancient Greek school of philosophy founded at Athens by Zeno of Citium. The school taught that virtue, the highest good, is based on knowledge, and that the wise live in harmony with the divine Reason (also identified with Fate and Providence) that governs nature, and are indifferent to the vicissitudes of fortune and to pleasure and pain.”

Stoicism helps us accept life as it is.  It helps us get past our labels of “good” & “bad.” Stoicism helps put us in a mindful state of awareness, getting us out of our constantly judging mind, enabling us to experience life fully, non-judgmentally.

In relation to living non-judgmentally, I’ve heard this quote: “What is chaos to the fly is normal to the spider.”

Shakespeare also said, “there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

We know what is good or bad in human terms, but there is a lot more going on in the universe than what we think.

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Think about the millions of galaxies just like this one. Or even think about 10 more. The Universe is vast.

There is so much happening beyond us.

We know that murder is a bad thing, yet cows, chickens and other animal life are murdered daily in our world.  I eat meat so I am not complaining, I am just trying to get us all to think.

Do you think eating dog is bad?

Multiple countries eat dog today, and other countries think that this is very wrong…Here is an article that came out April 3, 2018 that discusses how over 5 million dogs are eaten in Vietnam every year—Click Here For Article.

Is it wrong to kill animals for food? I don’t have that answer.

Maybe hundreds or thousands of years from now, if the human race is still around, they will wonder how we could have eaten the meat of other animals.

Maybe not though as well.

Look back to a few examples from recent centuries, the 1900’s & beyond, to things we look back on in disgust: Open racism, public hangings & no womens’ rights.

These injustices are still happening today in some places.

So this is what philosophy is; thinking. Thinking, learning & then living out the best life from what we know. Philosophy is about questions & perspectives.

Stoicism is not pessimistic, it is optimistic, you just need to see it in the right light.

Before I get to the main points of stoicism, I would like your feedback via email. I am considering writing a short ebook that will discuss stoicism in more detail.  I have about 70 pages of solid notes on the subject, & have read multiple books regarding stoicism, so if you would be interested in reading a short ebook(condensed to about 20 pages) please let me know!

For now, here is a summary of a few main points that stoicism offers & how we can apply them to our lives.

4 Main Points

1~Amor Fati

Which translates to a love of one’s fate•

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German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche was a big fan of amor fati. 

He is quoted saying, “my formula for greatness in a human being is amor fati: that one wants nothing to be different, not forward, not backward, not in all eternity. Not merely bear what is necessary, still less conceal it, but love it.”

The stoics also had another way of looking at this. They believed in a universal guiding force of the universe. They thought we are like a dog tied to a moving cart, and we have two options: We can try to dig our hind legs in, struggling to control everything, getting dragged & being challenged. Or we can enjoy the ride & live our best lives.

Last quote on Amor Fati:

“Demand not that things happen as you wish, but wish them to happen as they do, and you will go on well.” Epictetus (Philosopher & former slave)

Are you loving your fate?  If not, you can with practice, and it will help you live your best life.

2~Focus on what you can control and let go of the rest

Most of us have heard this quote: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Reinhold Niebuhr

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We have heard it, and might think, “yea that’s good, I should do that.” But we often don’t follow through with this quote.

We need to follow through with action. Make a list of things you can control, and a list of things you can’t control.  Then stop wasting any time on things you cannot control.  This takes time & practice, as I am practicing this myself and am not perfect at it.

I love this idea from Philip Ghezelbash that relates to focusing on the things we can control:

“Do you have a problem in your life?

No? ► Then don’t worry.

Yes? ► Can you do something about it?…

Yes? ► Then don’t worry.

No? ► Then don’t worry.”

I have been practicing this lately when I am stuck in traffic.  There is no reason to get upset in uncontrollable traffic, but many people do & I have too at times.  I’ve been reminding myself that I have no control over the traffic, and this reminder has been bringing me peace of mind.

3~Practice poverty & misfortune

This may sound counterproductive but it can actually help a person grow tremendously.

When we intentionally practice poverty & misfortune a few days each month, we will be more prepared and accepting for when it does come.

“We must learn to disappoint ourselves at leisure before the world ever has a chance to slap us by surprise at a time of its own choosing.” Alain de Botton

Alain goes on to say: “One of the goals of civilization is to instruct us in how to be sad rather than angry. Sadness may not sound very appealing. But it carries – in this context – a huge advantage. It is what allows us to detach our emotional energies from fruitless fury around things that (however bad) we cannot change and that are the fault of no-one in particular and – after a period of mourning – to refocus our efforts in places where our few remaining legitimate hopes and expectations have a realistic chance of success.”

Entrepreneur, practicer of stoicism, and author of a New York Times Best Selling Book, The 4-Hour Workweek, Tim Ferriss, practices this each month.  See him talk about it by clicking here

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Tim Ferriss

Ferriss talks about how the philosopher Cato, would practice poverty & misfortune:

During Cato’s age, over 2000 years ago, every now and then he would wear clothes that society viewed as humiliating.

Cato did this to train himself to be ashamed of only those things truly worth being ashamed about.

Deep down we know that clothes are nothing to be ashamed of, but many people spend a lot of money to buy brand clothing to impress people they don’t even like.

The philosopher Seneca also practiced this.  In one of his writings he wrote: “Set aside a certain number of days, during which you shall be content with the scantiest and cheapest fare, with coarse and rough dress, saying to yourself the while: ‘Is this the condition that I feared?’”

We undervalue what we have, because most likely we’ve always had it…

“Many of your fears are based on undervaluing the things that are easily obtainable.” Tim Ferriss

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Ferriss also practices this by doing fasts, not eating anything for days, & also doing fasts that include only eating rice, or only drinking water.  (If you plan on doing a fast, research it as much as possible beforehand).

This year I have done two 30 hour fasts, and multiple 16-20 hour fasts.

There has been a lot of research done on fasting, and it has many benefits.  This Harvard study explains how fasting can lead to a longer and healthier life: Click Here for the study.

I’ve been practicing this another way without even knowing it:  When I need clothes, I first go to Goodwill or other thrift stores, where I buy great clothes for a cheap price.  I am very glad my mother took us to thrift shops growing up; they really have some amazing gems.  And when I buy clothes that society might think is “poor,” that doesn’t bother me & I’ll still wear it.

Macklemore agrees here in his song Thrift shop(clean version).

He says, “I’m like, ‘yo, that’s 50 dollars for a t-shirt.’ Limited edition, let’s do some simple addition. 50 dollars for a t-shirt, that’s just some ignorant _____.

I call that getting tricked by the business.”

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Do we care that much about the opinions of others that we will spend enormous amounts of money to impress them?

2000 years ago, former Roman Emperor, Marcus Aurelius said, “it never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.

Think about what your life would be like without the things you have.  It could happen.  Better to have practiced misfortune so that if it comes to you, you won’t be bothered by it.

Are you practicing poverty & misfortune?  If not, do you think you will?

4~None of what you do lasts

Again, this may sound pessimistic, but it is liberating, and if you are still reading you can sense that practicing stoicism can be liberating.

Marcus Aurelius reminded himself of all the people who have died, whether they had a “great” occupation or a “lowly” one.  He said: “Run down the list of those who felt intense anger at something: the most famous, the most unfortunate, the most hated, the most whatever: Where is all that now? Smoke, dust, legend…or not even a legend. Think of all the examples. And how trivial the things we want so passionately are.

“No matter how clever or brilliant, none of what we do lasts…It’s good to remember that.” Ryan Holiday

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“If everything is ephemeral, what does matter?  Right now matters.  Being a good person and doing the right thing right now, thats what matters and that’s what was important to the Stoics. Be humble and honest and aware.” Ryan Holiday

If you want to really live your best life, it is important to frequently think of your own mortality. This will help you appreciate each and every moment, and not have such an intense fear of death that most people refuse to think about.

“You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.” Marcus Aurelius

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I hope you enjoyed learning about, or learning more about the wonderful philosophy of stoicism.  There are many more practices involved with stoicism; these were a few key starting points I believe are good to begin with, & they are ones that I am practicing.

If you want to learn more about stoicism, I recommend reading the book “Meditations” by Marcus Aurelius.  I recently read it & it is now one of my top 3 all-time favorite books.

And as I said, I have many notes on stoicism and am considering writing a short ebook on the subject to discuss it in more details (the ebook would be around 20 pages). If this is something you’d be interested in reading please let me know 🙂

I look forward to hearing from you, & hope you have gained a new perspective through reading this.

Cheers.

“In your actions, don’t procrastinate. In your conversations, don’t confuse. In your thoughts, don’t wander. In your soul, don’t be passive or aggressive. In your life, don’t be all about business.” Aurelius

Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?

What if what we thought about an event wasn’t always the best way of looking at it?

Many of us label our experiences and situations as “good,” or “bad,” and many other things.

This perspective limits us from living our best lives.

As a culture we have seemed to judge events as good or bad (luck), but sometimes when we think something “bad” has happened, it is good in disguise.  And sometimes when we think something “good” has happened, it is bad in disguise.

There’s an ancient proverb that elaborates this concept:

There was a farmer who had a beautiful strong horse that was used to plow his fields.

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One day, the horse escaped, and the farmer’s neighbors came to the man sympathizing about his bad luck.  The farmer replied, “Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?”

A few days later the horse returned with a herd of stallions.  This time the neighbors congratulated the farmer on his good luck.  He replied with, “Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?”

The next week when the farmer’s son was trying to tame one of the stallions, he fell off the horse and broke his leg. “What bad luck,” the neighbors told the farmer.  “Bad luck? Good luck?  Who knows?” Said the farmer.

A few days later an army came into the village, forcing every able-bodied youth to join them.  When they saw the farmer’s son with his broken leg, they didn’t bother to take him with them.

Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?

I’m sure you can think of a time when something bad happened but it turned out to help you in the end.  Was it good luck or bad luck?

We can’t always know the reason behind an event, so it’s important to keep a neutral attitude..

..To observe the events in our life without judging them, without drawing conclusions about them…This can bring about great peace of mind.

Great leaders understand this concept and are able to remain calm, trust life and themselves, take appropriate action, generate acceptance, and have a flexible attitude.

So the next time you’re in a situation that you label as “good” or “bad” I encourage you to ask yourself, “Good luck?” “Bad luck?” Who knows…

Thank you for reading!

Here’s another post that may also help you enable a different perspective: Question your Certainty

Interview with Youtuber Denise Vlogs

I had the pleasure of interviewing YouTube star Denise Vlogs via Skype!  Denise loves creating short horror films which you can check out HERE.

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She also vlogs her travels in which she has been all over the world; so if you love a good horror story and an adventure you need to check her channel out!  She has almost 100,000 YouTube subscribers and videos with over a million views.  She recently bought a one way ticket to Europe and was in the Capital of Portugal, Lisbon when I interviewed her.  For now, enjoy the q and a interview with Denise Vlogs:

  1. Hello Denise! Where are you from?

DV: “I was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York; moved to Los Angeles after graduating from Brooklyn College majoring in film production.”

2.  Where are you currently and would you like to live somewhere specific?

DV: “Lisbon, Porutgal.  If I had to settle it would be in Los Angeles.”  She knows a lot of people in Los Angeles, but is not too fond of living in the states because at the moment it is hard to be a freelancer here.

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City of Los Angeles California

3.  What is your dream job?

DV: “Film production; writing scripts, film maker, and that being the only source of income.”

4.  Do you have a role model?  Who is it and why?

DV: “Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu.  I met him when I worked as a receptionist at Anonymous Content.”  She watched his movies in film school where he was used as an example of a great foreign director and admired for his work.

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Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

5.  Since she had lived in Los Angeles for awhile I asked her if she met any celebrities and she did:                                                                                                                                                                                     DV: “I met Snoop Dogg, Ashton Kutcher..lots of famous people and  famous YouTubers.  I was more excited to meet other YouTubers because I wanted to collaborate with them.”

6.  Tell me about a project or accomplishment that you consider to be the most significant in your career.

DV: “DV Presents-Denise Vlogs presents;  a series of short films-10-20 of them.  I love these films that focus on a story.  These are what I love to make.”  Check out these videos HERE 

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7.  If you had a superpower what would it be?

DV: “Time travel—I’d warn my mom about her cancer so she would have survived; also a friend who died of the same cancer.  I’d tell myself to break up with several people.”

8.  What does your perfect day look like?

DV: “New experiences; a brand new country in a beautiful place.  When I just released a DV presents video, get a lot of money, and eat good food.”

9.  How would you spend a billion dollars?

DV: “Travel, film making, donate to charities.  I would save for 10 years and adopt a child.  Buy several properties all over the world.  Buy a citizenship in another country.  Never bring a suitcase with me everywhere I went; I’d shop wherever I went and then donate my old clothes.”

10.  What did you want to be when you grew up?

DV: “Starting at 11 I wanted to be a screen writer.  I wrote a script when was 11.  Before that I wanted to be an actress and singer, maybe I just wanted attention…I also wanted to be a meteorologist when I was really young; I was fascinated by natural disasters as a little kid.  My dad bought tons of movies, and my mom loved to watch scary movies so I would watch them with her and I really like them.  At sleepovers and with friends I would make up ghost stories with friends.  My uncle also told me he wrote a screen play when I was a young age, so that made me realize that anyone could do it!”  Her friends liked her scary stories the best!

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11.  What is the hardest part about maintaining the lifestyle you live?

DV: “I want to make more money; I just make enough to get by at the moment.  Being a digital nomad can be sad having to leave people after I connect with someone.  It can get lonely being by myself, so it might be nice to settle.”

12.  What do you enjoy most about your lifestyle?

DV: “New experiences and new people I get to meet all the time.  It’s a burst of energy when you connect to a new place.  I enjoy not having to sit in a desk every day, learning new things, creating content, and hopes I’ll have more time to create more content to focus on.”

13.  What kind of computer do you have?  You probably have to edit a lot for those awesome videos!!

DV:  “I recommend the MacBook Pro to edit videos and stuff.  I have the MacBook Pro 2014.  I use adobe premier to edit but for beginners recommend iMovie.  I use photoshop sometimes and would use a desktop but I move around a lot.”

Currently Denise is working now as a freelancer.  She edits videos, consults people and companies for social media– YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, etc.  She has looked into teaching online and possibly substitute teach.  She also like to volunteer to teach English.  She has two YouTube channels DeniseVlogs and DeniseActuallyVlogs.  She uses both channels but deniseactuallyvlogs is more casual.

Follow her on Twitter @DeniseVlogs, Instagram @DeniseVlogs.  Follow her travels on snapchat at DeniseVlogs too!

If you missed it at the top here is her youtube main page!

6 Human Needs; Why all people do what they do

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This post mainly comes from the ideas of the great Tony Robbins while I only add to it.

You are seeking emotions and experiences. After researching experts, I have found that there are six basic, universal needs that drive ALL human behavior. Every human being has these needs, but we each put different VALUE on these needs. Our focus on these needs will determine the direction of our life!  What need will you live for?

The six human needs include:

1) Certainty

2) Significance

3) Variety

4) Love/Connection

5) Growth

6) Contribution

Each of these needs influence every single human being’s life, and by understanding the needs that shape your behavior, you can take control of your life, and create new habits that lead you to the life you’ve been dreaming of living.

What do you think the most addictive thing in the world is???

Find out in a few paragraphs, it’s not what you think.

Before we get more into our human needs, lets look at how DECISIONS shape our destiny, and our decisions of course are intertwined with our needs.

Decision is the ultimate power. Decisions shape destiny.

There are 3 Decisions we are making EVERY moment of our lives:

1) What am I going to focus on?  Focus=feeling.  Past/present/Future…Self or others?

2) What does it(this situation/experience) mean? Is it the end or the beginning?  Are you being punished or rewarded?

3)What are your going to do? Are you going to give up or move forward?

We make these decisions consciously or unconsciously.**

Lance Armstrong for example could have focused on his cancer but he continued to focus on biking and being the best. He continued to win!

Rosa Parks.  Her focus was that she could change the world for her kids or grandkids instead of focusing on what she was told to do.  She wouldn’t go to the back of the bus & she changed the whole world!

Entrepreneur Tony Robbins also has an incredible story.  When he was a eleven years old with a very broke family and no food for Thanksgiving, a stranger came to his house on Thanksgiving to give them a turkey.  Tony’s angry father and himself had VERY different PERSPECTIVES/FOCUSES on this event that went like this:

Tony’s Father: His 3 decisions: Focus was “this is charity” What does it mean “I am worthless” What do I have to do? “Leave my family.” Which he did…

Tony’s focus:  There’s food!  What does it mean? “Strangers care about me and other people.”  What am I going to do?  “I’m going to do something to make a difference.” Six years later he started feeding families when he was 17. Slowly but surely he built a foundation and has fed millions of people all over the world.

Your FOCUS determines much of your life. Try to be intentional and conscious of what you focus on.

& The most addictive thing in the world is….

Most people will guess wrong. The answer is Problems.

**Most people find a way to feel significant by having a significant problem.  Problems are the safest way to connect with others and not be rejected. Problems are the biggest addiction in our culture.

And SiGNIFICANCE is one of the six human needs!!! Think about your life. Do you connect and feel significant through problems? And are you happy with constantly talking about problems or do you want to live a life with less complaining?

***Instead of just looking at peoples’ behaviors, see their attempts to meet their needs.***

A few insights into the 6 human needs:

1) Certainty

  • People like to be certain, to have financial security, to trust people and experiences. But too much certainty makes us bored, so we need some variety.

2) Variety

  • People like good surprises, if it’s a bad surprise they call it a problem.

3) Significance

  • We all need to feel important, special, unique..People do this in so many different ways-tattoos, religion, joining a group..etc..One of the quickest way some people feel significant is through Violence. Violent things happen each day, just watch the news; these people have a striving for significance, as well as some big mental problems..I encourage you to be significant in a positive way.  Join some great groups, read, write, travel.

4) What we really need is Connection & Love

  • Connection and love are like rain to a garden of flowers, they make us grow.  Surround yourself with people who support and love you. I am so thankful for my family because of their love. Also if you are feeling down and depressed, get a pet. Dogs will love you and are always happy to see you.  Cats are different, but they can show love to their owners as well.

Every human finds a way to meet the first 4 needs. What will your FOCUS be to meet these needs???

The next two needs create fulfillment!

5) Growth

If you don’t grow, you die. Relationships, businesses, self, etc.

  • We grow when we have something to give of value. So don’t always be thinking of yourself..I know it’s hard, but try to get out of yourself for awhile & see what you can give to others that can help them. EVERYONE has something great to contribute, but it can be very difficult to find it. Start by donating food or clothes, or doing something small for someone. It feels amazing and will help you grow. It’s funny how a selfless act will ultimately help you too.

6) To Contribute beyond ourselves

  • Growth and Contribution are intertwined. You grow by contributing.  Contribution=growth.

“The secret of living is giving.”

“It’s not about me, it’s about we.” Tony Robbins

People truly get excited to contribute once they experience it and not just talk about it.

We ALL have the same needs, but whatever need leads us will lead us to our destination.

People all try to meet the same needs, but we do it in different ways. A firefighter saves lives for significance while someone else kills a person for significance.

Try to appreciate how people are attempting to meet their needs, explore your decisions, and give.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO FOCUS ON?

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

45 Life Lessons

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  1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
  2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
  3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
  4. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
  5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
  6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
  7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
  8. Save for retirement, starting with your first paycheck.
  9. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
  10. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
  11. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
  12. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  13. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
  14. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
  15. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
  16. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
  17. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
  18. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
  19. Burn the candles; use the nice sheets; wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
  20. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
  21. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
  22. The most important sex organ is the brain.
  23. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
  24. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter?”
  25. Forgive everyone everything.
  26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
  27. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
  28. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
  29. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
  30. Believe in miracles.
  31. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
  32. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
  33. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
  34. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
  35. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
  36. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
  37. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
  38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
  39. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
  40. The best is yet to come.
  41. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, and show up.
  42. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
  43. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
  44. Yield.
  45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

These are all so good.  I read this a few times!  Credit to Regina Brett.  Which is your favorite??

Get more free time by using Parkinson’s Law!

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Parkinson’s Law dictates that a task will swell in perceived importance and complexity in relation to the time allotted to its completion.

We work on things with a given deadline, but if we have no deadline we will take up all sorts of time wasting it.

Example—Someone who has a leisure day with no deadlines can spend the whole day writing an easy college essay that is due the next day.  This essay should take no more than one hour, but lets see what happens…

The person wakes up slow, makes coffee and eats, showers, and 1-2 hours is gone.  They look at what they have to do for a few minutes then get distracted with social media and surfing the web for an hour.  Decide to watch Netflix for an hour or two, and the day is almost evening..

..They open up their paper and work on it for about 5 minutes before getting distracted and going back to checking out social media.  This cycle continues for hours until they finally begin and finish the paper around midnight.  The paper would have only taken at most an hour to finish, but this person believed they did not need to finish it first thing in the morning so they took all day to do it.  They did not have a specific deadline for the paper!

This is similar to a typical 9-5 workday where many people babble their days away with coworkers in pointless conversation.  There have been studies done about how much people actually work throughout the day at their 9-5 jobs and the average does actual work-related tasks about half of the time.

Useless meetings, lunch and water breaks, surfing the web and other distracting things take them away from “what they should be doing.”  And if their bosses allow it, I would do it too!  If a boss gives an employee a week to do something, that person will take the full week to lazily do that task, when it could be done in a much shorter time if given a shorter deadline. Check cartoon below↓↓↓

Parkinsons2

“Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.”  I can’t say it enough.

By assigning the right amount go time to a task, we gain back more time and the task will reduce in complexity to its natural state.

Parkinson’s Law works because people give tasks longer than they really need, for different reasons, because they have an inflated idea of how long the task will take to complete.  **You can’t realize how quickly some tasks can be completed until you test this principle.

Work smarter, not harder…when most people are working harder and not smarter.

A practical way for you to complete goals/tasks faster:

  • Make a list of your tasks for the day, week, month, etc.  and divide them up by the amount of time you think it will take to complete them.  Then write down half of that time that you first gave yourself to complete each task!  Make sure you view your deadlines just as crucial as you would if completing it for a boss.
  • Stop checking your phone and email every 15 minutes and take 45-60 minutes of focused time to only work on your main task.

When you begin applying Parkinson’s Law to your life and your tasks, you will begin to be more productive than you’ve ever imagined.

Please share and comment, letting me know your thoughts and how Parkinson’s Law has helped you!