Don’t look back for too long…

Or you’ll crash…

When you aren’t following your own vision and goals you are likely to follow someone else’s vision and goals.

What are your goals?

Remember and never forget that you are the driver of your life. You are empowered to do great things. Everyone makes mistakes. There’s pain in all our lives. Keep going though. You have something the world needs.

“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.”
Helen Keller

Read more related quotes and ideas here.

Love. Peace. Happiness.

8 Dan Millman Quotes on Being Happy Without Reason

1) “You don’t need a reason to be happy. If you do that reason can be taken away.”

2) “‘What do I do then, now? Where do I go from here?’ Dan asked Socrates.
‘Who cares?’ He yelled gleefully. ‘A fool is ‘happy’ when his cravings are satisfied. A warrior is happy without reason.  That’s what makes happiness the ultimate discipline—above all else I have taught you.’”

3) “Reality never matched their dreams; happiness was just around the corner — a corner they never turned. And the source of it all was the human mind.”

4) “There is no need to search; achievement leads to nowhere. It makes no difference at all, so just be happy now! Love is the only reality of the world, because it is all One, you see. And the only laws are paradox, humor and change. There is no problem, never was, and never will be. Release your struggle, let go of your mind, throw away your concerns, and relax into the world. No need to resist life, just do your best. Open your eyes and see that you are far more than you imagine. You are the world, you are the universe; you are yourself and everyone else, too! It’s all the marvelous Play of God. Wake up, regain your humor. Don’t worry, just be happy. You are already free!” 

5) “Sometimes sorrow, sometimes joy. But beneath it all remember the innate perfection of your life unfolding. That is the secret of unreasonable happiness.” 

6) “And so I awoke to reality, free of any meaning or any search. What could there possibly be to search for? All of Socrate’s words had come alive with my death. This was the paradox of it all, the humor of it all, and the great change. All searches, all achievements, all goals, were equally enjoyable, and equally unnecessary.” 

7) “The secret of happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less.”

8) “Act happy, be happy, without a reason in the world. Then you can love, and do what you will.”

Perfection IS the Goal. Progress is what we get.

A lot of people say “don’t try to be perfect” but I disagree.


DO try to be perfect but FIRST DEFINE what perfect is for you!


Perfect is an ideal but it IS something to aim for.


If you don’t aim for the bullseye you’ll never hit it.


If you’re a pitcher in baseball you usually aim for the strike zone.
Pitchers aim for perfection.

Aim for progress and you’ll get less than that.

Aim for perfection and you’ll get progress.


Think about areas in your life that you would like to improve and then aim for the best possible outcome.

The more you aim for what you want, the more you’ll get it. Again, a dart thrower wanting to hit bullseye but never aiming for bullseye will most likely never hit it.


Of course not everything will go perfect, but if you never aim for it you’ll never come close.

Set your aim to the best possible outcome, take action, repeat.

Perfection is the aim. Progress is what you get.

Finding Joy Now

My focus shifts from one task to another as my thoughts wander and I drift further and further away from the present moment. 

This has happened to me many times and I’m sure will happen again in the future, but I have learned a few methods to finding and feeling joy in this moment right now.

Of course some people will say that to attain joy you need to exercise, eat healthy, don’t smoke, save money for retirement — to Do these things _________… and don’t do these things __________… Then you will be happy. And that’s just not true.

You either feel joy now or you don’t. It’s not something you will forever maintain once you accomplish this thing or that thing. It’s something to be had in this moment and to keep with you deep down as you journey through life. Even through the hard times that life brings to us all you will be able to remind yourself of the genuine joy you have. 

coacht.blog gratitude Joy

Joy comes from a multitude of actions and it’s unique to everyone. One big source of joy comes from loving what you do.

This is difficult in societies that tell us to live for the future – to disregard your happiness for 30-40 years and then you can be happy in retirement. It’s a lie and it has made many CEO’s wealthy.

I do believe in hard work and I believe in doing what you need to do to provide for yourself and your family, but in this internet age it is possible to find joy today while working toward financial freedom and other long-term goals.

Once you accept some inalienable truths you can experience a deep joy. Things such as: 

– Tomorrow isn’t promised.
– One day you are going to leave this planet forever (Memento Mori).
– This moment might be all you have.

Of course there are more inalienable truths, but these are a few that inspire me to find joy today, tomorrow, and throughout all the ups and downs of life.

coacht.blog Focus

Below are some exercises that have helped me and can help you. Each person is unique and will find joy in different ways so use what works for you.

-Remind yourself of a happy memory. Dwell in that memory for at least one minute.

-Remind yourself that the best times of your life haven’t happened yet. They are on their way.

-Think of someone you look up to as a role model. Remind yourself why you look up to them.

-Think of 3 accomplishments you are proud of that you have achieved in the past.

-Write down 3 things you enjoy doing – Can be anything – a sport, hanging out with people, going to a certain place, any hobby you have or would like to have.

-Try affirmations. Tell yourself “I am happy now. I am loved. I love life.”

-Think about what you would like to do if you didn’t have to worry about money. Remind yourself that it is possible to attain this in time. Don’t forget it.

-Observe your surroundings without thinking about them. Just see everything without labeling them for a few moments.

-Stargaze.

-Read something new.

-Surround yourself with a few objects that make you feel good.

Text Call someone you love.

Your joy is to be experienced today. Of course you won’t feel joy in every moment of your life, no one does, but you can take action toward living a more joyful life. 

Achieve Goals with Focus

My to-do list grows bigger and I start taking less action…

Am I the only one who gets distracted with all the “to-dos” and end up not getting anything done?

Sometimes I want to complete so many things that I end up completing nothing or going halfway on a task. This is when I remind myself to do less and Focus.

Ken Thompson. coacht.blog Focus

We are bombarded with numerous options every day of our lives. It can seem nice to have options but often the more options we have the more distracted we become.

So I ask myself, “What is a long-term goal I have and what do I need to do next to achieve it?”

I like this question but sometimes a clear answer doesn’t come to mind when I ask this. This is when Focus comes into play again.

At this point I think about a few things I could do to achieve my long-term goal. I might not be 100% sure about what to do but I choose an action whether it’s to write a blog post, create a video, work on social media, etc.

I follow one course until successful. I do it until it’s complete. And then I ask myself again, “What is a long-term goal I have and what do I need to do next to achieve it?”

What’s a long-term goal you have?

What actions are you taking to achieve it?

It’s okay to not know

I was in my senior year of high school when I was asked for the millionth time by another “adult:” “What are you going to major in?”

I had no idea. Later that evening I was talking to my dad & I asked him what he thought I should major in. I’m sure he gave me some ideas but what I vividly remember from that conversation is him telling me that it’s also okay if I don’t know right now.

“It’s okay to not know.”

That answer seemed somewhat surprising after numerous teachers & “adults” spoke of how important it was to know what you were going to major in.

This advice gave me a huge sense of relief and I still use it today in a number of situations.

I went into college with no major, undeclared, for my first 2 years, then I actually had to decide.

I chose based off of what my interests were, not off of what would make me the most money, and I am happy with my choices. I have a degree in Sport Management, a minor in Business, and a Masters of Education degree.

coacht.blog college degree

I wasn’t worried about the future when I entered college undeclared.

“Know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.”
Mary Schmich

My focus was on the day at hand. My focus was to live life to the fullest while completing everything needed to graduate.

I knew that it was okay to not try to know exactly how my future would pan out, but to trust it would turn out well, and I took actions based on that faith, like this quote from Alan Watts:

 “To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don’t grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float.” 

 

But it can be easy to get caught up in worrying about the countless tasks you need to complete. I do that sometimes, but when I know I’m worrying I remind myself to focus on what I can do to return to peace of mind. 

Worry can be a motivator to get things done, but it can be a cage as well. Uncertainty lives with all of us, every single day. It’s always there, like gravity. How will you deal with it?

“The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty that you can comfortably live with.”
Tony Robbins

So it’s completely okay to not know.

“The only thing I know is that I know nothing.”
Socrates

But what happens when you really want to know?

You want to know the answer.
You want to know what to do.
You want to know what will happen.

You want certainty in uncertain things and there are ways to create some certainty during uncertain times.

 

There are ways to create some certainty during uncertain times.

One way is to dwell in the idea that life is working out in everyone’s best interest, even during down times. And if you’re constantly hating your job then that could be life telling you to quit & find work that you enjoy.

—The second way is to focus on making progress.
If you really want to “grab life by the horns” and take control of your life, progress is key. You might feel stuck at a job you hate or lost in what you think you should do.

 

How can you make progress?

 

—Begin by asking yourself “what does my ideal life look like?”

Think about ideals in a variety of aspects in your life: Financial, relationships, career, hobbies, environment, etc.

This is the time to let go of any limiting beliefs you have and raise your standards. 

Even if you don’t believe you can have your ideal life just pretend for a moment and think about what it would look like.

—Know your “why.”

Why do you want your ideal life? Think about all your reasons. It could be for your happiness, to provide for your family, to start a charity, to buy a new car, etc.

—Take Action

Begin taking action toward your ideal life. Your reasons for making it happen will grow stronger from here.

 

Uncertainty surrounds us every day.

How will you make the most of it?

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Quotes!

“The root of suffering is resisting the certainty that no matter what the circumstances, uncertainty is all we truly have.”
 Pema Chödrön

“We absolutely must leave room for doubt or there is no progress and there is no learning. There is no learning without having to pose a question. And a question requires doubt. People search for certainty. But there is no certainty. People are terrified — how can you live and not know? It is not odd at all. You only think you know, as a matter of fact. And most of your actions are based on incomplete knowledge and you really don’t know what it is all about, or what the purpose of the world is, or know a great deal of other things. It is possible to live and not know.”
Richard Feynman

“There are many things of which we are completely unaware—in fact, there are things of which we are so unaware, we don’t even know we are unaware of them.”
Donald Rumsfeld

“Suspecting and knowing are not the same.”
Rick Riordan

“People don’t know that they don’t know. Remember that before you hold it against them.”
Akiroq Brost

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.”
Gilda Radner

“A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.”
William Shakespeare

“Everything you’ve learned in school as “obvious” becomes less and less obvious as you begin to study the universe. For example, there are no solids in the universe. There’s not even a suggestion of a solid. There are no absolute continuums. There are no surfaces. There are no straight lines.”
Richard Buckminster Fuller

“Beyond all sciences, philosophies, theologies, and histories, a child’s relentless inquiry is truly all it takes to remind us that we don’t know as much as we think we know.”
Criss Jami

The Question IS The Answer

Will this article make you smarter?

Questions. Questions. Questions.

Everyone is looking for answers. No one is looking for questions.

But the answer is within the question.

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Research has been done by scientists on the power questions have on human brains.

Questions trigger a reflex in humans know as “instinctive elaboration,” which means when someone asks you a question, the question takes over the brain’s thought process. 

Behavioral scientists Morwitz, Johnson, and Schmittlein did a study on this topic and found that asking people questions about their futures significantly influenced their decisions. This is known as the “mere measurement effect.” The study was done in 1993 with over 40,000 participants by asking them if they were going to purchase a new car within six months. This question increased their purchase rates by 35%.

Similar surveys have been done on the topics of voting, donating blood, exercise frequency, and more. 

Each survey found that all these behaviors can be increased by asking about them!

Your mind is powerful!

Research has found that the more the brain thinks about a certain behavior, the more likely it is that you will do it.

Thinking about something can change your behavior and sensations.

Imagine sipping some warm hot chocolate. 

Can you taste it? 

Can you notice your mind shifted its focus from where it was to the hot chocolate?

Your mind is powerful…

 

So if you never ask a question, you will never get an answer.

If you ask a negative question like, “why do bad things always happen to me?” You will get an answer, and it will reinforce bad things happening to you.

If you ask a positive question like, “how can I live my best life?” You will get an answer and it will reinforce ideas of how you can live your best life.

Questions are powerful tools you can use to live more of the life you want to live.

coacht.blog Tim Ferriss Quote Questions

 

Here are some others who strongly agree:

“Problems that remain persistently insoluble should always be suspected as questions asked in the wrong way.”
Alan Watts

“Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.”
Tony Robbins

“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”
Voltaire

“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.”
Eugene Ionesco

“Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”
Rainer Maria Rilke

“One of the many qualities that separate self-made billionaires from the rest of us is their ability to ask the right questions.”
Justine Musk

“Always the beautiful answer who asks a more beautiful question.”
E. E. Cummings

“If you do not know how to ask the right question, you discover nothing.”
W. Edwards Deming

“Life is an unanswered question, but let’s still believe in the dignity and importance of the question.”
Tennessee Williams

“I think that probably the most important thing about our education was that it taught us to question even those things we thought we knew.”
Thabo Mbeki

He must be very ignorant for he answers every question he is asked.”
Voltaire

“A wise man’s question contains half the answer.”
Solomon Ibn Gabirol

A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.”
Francis Bacon

 

7 powerful questions Tony Robbins asks to spark positive emotions are:

—What am I happy about in my life now?

—What am I excited about in my life now?

—What am I proud about in my life now?

—What am I grateful about in my life now?

—What am I enjoying in life right now?

—What am I committed to in my life right now?

—Who do I love? Who loves me?

 

What are 3 other questions you can think of that by asking yourself them will help you achieve a goal?