Doubt Breeds REAL Confidence

“If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties.”

Francis Bacon

Have you ever been so confident in something & then ended up wrong?
I have. 

I’ve tried to put together a small table without following the directions & after failing I finally decided to use the directions.

An ignorant confidence does that to us all. Blind faith is easy.

Over the years I have learned that I know nothing for sure. I am confident in that and so I can live confidently, forever learning. Confident in trying something so many times, and failing, until I can do it with complete confidence.

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Confidence is a great trait to have in all aspects of life, but HOW you gain that confidence is more important than “confidence” itself.

 

In a world that praises fake confidence & bravado, why and how can you use doubt to breed REAL confidence?

“The dumbest people I know are those who know it all.”
Malcolm Forbes

Remain humble —You stop learning when you are confident in “knowing it all:”

“Men cease to think when they think they know it all.”
Horace

“The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
Stephen Hawking

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Doubt can help you improve.
It’s a sign that there is something to learn, always.

Instead of having blind confidence in whatever it is you’re doing, question it & LEARN.

Do you follow directions when building things like tables for the first time?
I do now. Doubt guides me to follow the directions because I doubt I can build a table without directions if I’ve never done it before.

So why can’t we apply this idea to other aspects of life?

We can.

We can question things & look for answers until we learn what we need to to succeed & grow in that area. 

And no matter what there’s always more to learn!

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Doubt allows you to think critically and opens your mind.

“If someone can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in any thought or action, I shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone: the harm is to persist in one’s own self-deception and ignorance.” 
Marcus Aurelius

 

Having doubt will prepare you for anything you anticipate. Soldiers train every day to stay ready for battle, because if they had 100% confidence without training, they would fail. Doubt is a guide for them, as it is with all people.

“The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize.”
Robert Hughes

 

People who doubt are preparing themselves for the future, which is today. (Yesterday the future was today…)

“If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.”
René Descartes

 

Some people don’t want to be wrong in the fear of looking stupid. That is stupidity in itself.

“The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence.”
Charles Bukowski

“The less people know, the more stubbornly they know it.”
Rajneesh

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Ignorance is NOT bliss.

Doubt is a good thing.

It will lead you to a REAL, humble confidence.

Doubt will keep you learning and growing throughout all of your days.

“Uncertainty also relieves us of our judgment of ourselves. Then we don’t know if we’re lovable or not; we don’t know how attractive we are; we don’t know how successful we could potentially become. The only way to achieve these things is to remain uncertain of them and be open to finding them out through experience. Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth. As the old adage goes, the man who believes he knows everything learns nothing. We cannot learn anything without first not knowing something.” 
Mark Manson

“Always be suspicious of those who pretend to know it all, claim their way is the best way and are willing to force their way on the rest of us.”
Walter Williams

“The only thing I know is that I know nothing.”
Socrates

 

I can agree with Socrates in saying that I also know nothing.

You don’t need to fight doubt. It’s there for a reason.

Allow doubt to prepare you and guide you to real confidence.

 

 

In All Things, Use what Works for You

“Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.”

Bruce Lee

 

How often have you been told what to do with your life?

Most people who give you unsolicited advice have good intentions but it doesn’t mean that what has worked for them will work for you.

“Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”
Paulo Coelho

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It’s easy to get lost in all the things you “should do,” as people will tell you, while forgetting about what you actually want to do.

It can be extremely difficult when it seems like everyone else is doing what people say you “should do”, like going to college, but it’s not for everyone.

Here are some people who didn’t go or dropped out of college:

Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, Ted Turner, Tony Robbins, Richard Branson, Ellen DeGeneres, Rachael Ray, Michael Dell, Jack Dorsey, Russell Simmons, John D. Rockefeller, Henry Ford, and many others. Find a list of 100 here.

Remember this quote from Mark Twain whenever you are thinking that you should be doing what others are doing:

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

 

If you’re struggling in an area where you see others succeeding in, it doesn’t make you dumb, it just tells you that that area is not for you, unless you’re passionate about it. You can learn & master any skill you want through relentless practice.

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” 
Albert Einstein

 

A variety of life experiences & hobbies can help you figure out your passion.

Maybe it’s writing, acting, speaking, athletics, designer, teacher, attendant, horse trainer.

But people say, “you can’t do that, no one makes money doing that.”

Except they do…

If there is anyone doing what you would love to do, you can do it too.

You may have to take some side jobs as you focus on getting paid to do what you love, but if you are passionate enough about it, you will find a way.

“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.”
Steve Jobs

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You are unique.

People find the most happiness when they embrace their uniqueness instead of trying to please people & fit in.

Maybe you learn best visually while someone else learns best verbally.
Or aurally, physically, logically, socially, or solitary.

Which way is best? 

There is no “best.” There is only what is best for you.

Find out how you learn best & don’t judge yourself.

I think I learn best visually—I like demonstrations especially when I am able to get involved.

“Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.”
Benjamin Franklin

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There are many crossroads in life, leaving you with multiple choices. The easy path is to follow what others are doing.

A nurse who spent years working in palliative care, taking care of people in the last 12 weeks of their lives, researched and wrote the top five regrets people have on their deathbeds.

The most common regret was “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Find the article here.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Use what works for you, not what works for someone else.

Here are 3 more ways to live life you won’t regret

 

 

Quotes to help find and follow your bliss

“You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don’t make money your goal. Instead pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you.”
Maya Angelou

“If it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, go out and sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures. Sweep streets like Handel and Beethoven composed music. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and say, here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.

“The people who make it to the top – whether they’re musicians, or great chefs, or corporate honchos – are addicted to their calling … [they] are the ones who’d be doing whatever it is they love, even if they weren’t being paid.”
Quincy Jones

“There comes a time when you ought to start doing what you want. Take a job that you love. You will jump out of bed in the morning. I think you are out of your mind if you keep taking jobs that you don’t like because you think it will look good on your resume. Isn’t that a little like saving up sex for your old age?”
Warren Buffet

“I think the foremost quality – there’s no success without it – is really loving what you do. If you love it, you do it well, and there’s no success if you don’t do well what you’re working at.”
Malcolm Forbes

“When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bounds. Your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. Dormant forces, faculties and talents become alive, and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.”
Patanjali

“The law of work seems unfair, but nothing can change it; the more enjoyment you get out of your work, the more money you will make.”
Mark Twain

“Everyone has been made for some particular work, and the desire for that work has been put in every heart.”
Rumi

“Yes, I’ve made a great deal of dough from my fiction, but I never set a single word down on paper with the thought of being paid for it … I have written because it fulfilled me. Maybe it paid off the mortgage on the house and got the kids through college, but those things were on the side—I did it for the buzz. I did it for the pure joy of the thing. And if you can do it for the joy, you can do it forever.”
Stephen King

“I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: ‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”
Steve Jobs

The Collapse & Renewal of “The System”

Can you feel it?

The tensions rising along with the sea levels.

Awareness rising in the corruption that has contaminated the entire world from micro to macro levels and everything in between.

I know you can feel it. I can too.

We’re coming to a tipping point in the Systems we’ve built throughout the previous centuries.

These Systems can’t last if we want to last as a human race.

The game of Power, Corruption, and Deception are fading, making way for an up to date and well founded System.

Is it difficult to believe that it’s possible to have Systems built on Trust, Cooperation, Shared Success, and Forgiveness that disciplines with love and does not punish mindlessly?

When a baby is learning to walk and they fall, do you punish them?

Do you tell them “You’re no good. You’re never going to be able to walk. Don’t even try it. Go to your crib.”

Or do you lift them up and encourage them, knowing that they will walk one day.

In life, when we humans are learning to “human,” and we make a mistake we are usually punished for it.

There’s no love in punishment so there’s no real growth. I understand if you believe there is love in punishment because that is what recent generations have been raised to believe. But many many studies show how punishment is not working!

Here is an article from Psychology Today discussing the many ways punishment impacts your child, including how punishment does not teach your child accountability. Also 10 ways to guide children without punishment is included in this article.

Here is a Pinterest page sharing many articles on how to love your kids and others unconditionally as well as how to deal with aggressive or inappropriate behavior in others.

I don’t know the full solution but I do know that discipline with love would help.

Is that hard to do? Absolutely.

And it’s easy to punish.

We all know that beautiful things take time to flourish, such as a flower. It needs cared for and nurtured to grow. If we punish the flower by cutting part of it off it will never be able to blossom into the flower it is meant to become.

Of course there will be resistance and some discomfort against the new System, as there is with all fights for justice, but in the end “the arc of the moral universe bends toward justice,” as MLK Jr. once said.

They say if it’s not broken don’t fix it…But we’ve got ourselves a broken System.

I do love my country but don’t you also want a better life for future generations of all backgrounds?

Education. Politics. Athletics. Business. Hollywood. And just about all current Systems have some corruption within them.

You can’t blame them though. That’s just how it’s been. 

But it’s a new day. It’s a new era.

The shame blame game will hopefully come to an end and love with discipline can take its place.

No one is perfect, and until we can fully realize that and change how we deal with all our imperfections and how we treat each other, we just won’t last.

Who am I to write this? Just a flawed fellow human on this journey of life, trying to figure it out.

But we adapt. That’s what we do as humans. Look at history.

Shall we adapt once more?

If you believe in a new System you might also like this relative & unique rap song I recorded in the studio called “Cloud 9”

What methods do you believe would contribute to a more stable and just System?

What would you do if you didn’t have to worry about Money?

What would you really do?

How would you spend your days?

(Download 7 Methods the Happiest & Most Successful People Use to Live their Dreams at Bottom of Page)

Cancun

Took this picture as I enjoyed my time in Cancun Mexico

This might be the most important question you ask yourself on your journey toward happiness.

I’ve read that between 70-90% of all people are going to a job they hate. Are you part of that large percentage?

So think about it. Continue dwelling on those questions until you come up with what you really want to do. It may take days, weeks, months or even years to find out what you really want to do, so be patient-or be impatient and settle for a job you hate.

Don’t disregard your first instinct. If it is something such as acting, writing, traveling the world, being a professional athlete, teaching, painting then that is wonderful. It can be anything! Too many people look past their true dreams because society has driven this limited view into us. We have been told that our dreams are not actually possible by authority, then we don’t question them, so we settle.

Dream Picture

For years I have asked myself this question, and one of my instinctual thoughts has always been “acting.” I didn’t know how it would happen, but I knew that it is something I would like to do. As I’ve continued to dwell on what I want, acting opportunities began to arise. I’ve been in multiple movies, TV shows and commercials, have met many famous people on sets and I am currently working as an Acting Teacher.

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I continue to listen to life and adapt as well, as our passions can change throughout the years. I have been blogging for a few years, and a few months ago I got an opportunity to become an intern for the best-selling author, Ryan Holiday. I have published posts for one his websites, done research, editing, but most importantly (after having faith) I put in a lot of focused hours into the work! Your dream is possible.

“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.” MLK Jr.

I never knew how it would all happen, and it is still happening, but I had faith that it would happen.

You don’t need to know HOW it will happen!

You just need to know what it is you actually want, and then believe it is possible. I found out some of the powers of the mind and the power of life at some point in college, and I have been trusting it ever since. Instinct…

Intuition: Life is talking to you. Are you listening?

If you aren’t sure how to listen to your intuition, no need to worry, intuition can be practiced and improved upon.

Coach T Books

Books!!!!

Some ways to improve intuition:

•Meditation: “Think Less to Live More

•Spend time in nature. Shut off your mind & observe the beauties of life.

•Read books and other content on developing intuition. 

Developing & listening to intuition has been one of the characteristics that has helped many of the happiest & most successful people live out their dreams.

For more techniques on how people are living their dreams you can grab a free copy of  7 Methods the Happiest & Most Successful People Use to Live Out Their Dream Life. You can get it sent to your email by clicking here!