Author: Ken Thompson

Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?

Posted on by in Lifestyle, Motivation, Self-Help and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

What if what we thought about an event wasn’t always the best way of looking at it?

Many of us label our experiences and situations as “good,” or “bad,” and many other things.

This perspective limits us from living our best lives.

As a culture we have seemed to judge events as good or bad (luck), but sometimes when we think something “bad” has happened, it is good in disguise.  And sometimes when we think something “good” has happened, it is bad in disguise.

There’s an ancient proverb that elaborates this concept:

There was a farmer who had a beautiful strong horse that was used to plow his fields.

One day, the horse escaped, and the farmer’s neighbors came to the man sympathizing about his bad luck.  The farmer replied, “Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?”

A few days later the horse returned with a herd of stallions.  This time the neighbors congratulated the farmer on his good luck.  He replied with, “Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?”

The next week when the farmer’s son was trying to tame one of the stallions, he fell off the horse and broke his leg. “What bad luck,” the neighbors told the farmer.  “Bad luck? Good luck?  Who knows?” Said the farmer.

A few days later an army came into the village, forcing every able-bodied youth to join them.  When they saw the farmer’s son with his broken leg, they didn’t bother to take him with them.

Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?

I’m sure you can think of a time when something bad happened but it turned out to help you in the end.  Was it good luck or bad luck?

We can’t always know the reason behind an event, so it’s important to keep a neutral attitude..

..To observe the events in our life without judging them, without drawing conclusions about them…This can bring about great peace of mind.

Great leaders understand this concept and are able to remain calm, trust life and themselves, take appropriate action, generate acceptance, and have a flexible attitude.

So the next time you’re in a situation that you label as “good” or “bad” I encourage you to ask yourself, “Good luck?” “Bad luck?” Who knows…

Thank you for reading!

Here’s another post that may also help you enable a different perspective: Question your Certainty

Dream Big. How I got Involved with Acting

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The first time I remember wanting to be an actor was after watching Jim Carrey starring in the movie, The Mask.  I watched it on VHS! Do you remember those?

I enjoyed watching Jim in his many roles as I was growing up, and so he was one of the first people that gave me inspiration to become an actor.

But after getting a little older, I realized that “no-one” can actually become an actor..right?  Wrong.  If no-one could become an actor, how are there actors?  ..“Because they are born into it” or because they “got lucky,” is what many people say..  Oh.

That is the mindset when you grow up in a small town that is 2,000+ miles away from Los Angeles.

So I continued living my life as a kid with little responsibilities, focusing on school, athletics, friends and family….and catching crayfish

Kenny Thompson

I’m on the right side holding the crayfish above Peter’s head.  Thank you Ginny for the picture!

The older I got, the more people asked what I wanted to do with my life, because that’s what happens when we get older right.

I never really had a good answer for them.  I didn’t know what I wanted to do.  I think that most people don’t know what they want to do so they just choose a generic field to study and then they follow through with it.  They end up living a 9-5 life that they don’t really enjoy so that they can spend their money on a house that is used for sleeping and a car used for driving to work.

Alan Watts says “That’s just stupid to live like that.  Better to have a short life that is full of what you like doing than a long life spent in a miserable way.”

Ask yourself “What do I really want to do with my life?”

After two years of being undeclared in college, I literally had to choose a major, so I chose Sports Administration with a Business minor.  I thought, “Well I like sports so I’ll try this.”  Throughout the next years when I got closer to graduating, the thoughts of what I want to do with my life came to me again.

I thought, “I think I would really like to be an actor.”  But not knowing how I could become an actor was a big obstacle for me.  Philosopher Alan Watts inspired me in his video “What if Money Was No Object?”

After listening to many of Watt’s speeches, as well as reading and listening to Ram Dass, Dan Millman, Dale Carnegie, Steve Jobs, Tim Ferriss & John Lee Dumas, I really knew that I didn’t want to work a 7-3, or 8-4, or 9-5 job that I did not enjoy going to for the next 30-40 years of my life so that I can retire and “be happy.”

(Recent inspiration from: Marcus Aurelius, Eckhart Tolle, Mark Manson, Ryan Holiday, Tony Robbins, Derek Sivers).

So even after knowing I didn’t want to have that 8 hour a day job at somewhere I don’t enjoy, I thought it would be a good idea to get my Masters in Education to become a teacher.

School was never that hard for me, but there were definitely some overwhelming times while I was getting my Masters Degree.  I had the end goal in mind, of getting this degree, so I knew that I was going to get things done whether I felt like it or not.

My First Movie

Anyway right before I began my Master’s Program, there was a movie to be filmed on my Universities Campus (I.U.P.).  That movie was Southpaw, starring Jake Gyllenhaal, Rachel McAdams and 50 Cent, directed by Antoine Fuqua.

When I found out about this, I asked myself, “How can I get involved with this movie?”  So I googled information about the movie and found that they were looking for people to play as extras in the movie.  I went to an audition for the movie, they asked some questions, took some pictures and I was on my way.

I didn’t receive a call for weeks, and the movie began filming so I thought that I was not going to get a call.

But one day, I was working as a Sports Information employee in the building where Southpaw was being filmed, the K.C.A.C in I.U.P. and I went to a bathroom.  As I was at the urinal, a man came into the bathroom and went to a urinal nearby (there were only 2 or 3 urinals).  So I struck up a conversation, asking him if he was involved with the movie.  He responded by telling me that he was the director.

It was Antoine Fuqua!  The man who directed Training Day with Denzel Washington.

Anyway, I asked him if he needed any help with the movie and that I would work for free.  He asked if I would like to be an actor.  And I jokingly said, “Well I have the face right?”  We both laughed after we washed our hands and were exiting the bathroom.  Once outside the bathroom he called someone over.  They came over and he told them to get my information down and put me in the movie.

I got a call the next day to be a character as a press/media journalist for the movie during the boxing scenes.  I got paid and also got to personally meet 50 Cent, while being in the vicinity of Jake Gyllenhaal and Rachel McAdams.

Anyone who has worked on a movie set knows that they are long days, usually between 10-14 hours of work, with a lot of chill time in between shooting scenes.  It’s not for everyone, but I loved it.

I had my first taste of what being on the set of a feature film was like.  It was exhilarating.

I had met another actor on set who told me about an agency he was with in Pittsburgh who frequently sent out casting notices, so I got involved with them after working in this film.

They helped me get into two more huge movies and two tv shows.

The movies were: Concussion & Love The Coopers.

I played a NFL Employee in the movie Concussion and a Diner Patron in Love the Coopers.

The TV shows were: Banshee & Mindhunter.

I played an amish protestor as well as a news reporter in the show Banshee (did multiple episodes), and I played a police officer in Mindhunter.

I recently got into a commercial & a paid student film that I will talk about shortly.

Each set is a unique and wonderful experience.  There is no set that is exactly like the next, which makes acting exciting.  It’s also fun when you get to meet some pretty famous people and work with them.

While I was working as a police officer on the set of Mindhunter (which is on Netflix), I was able to meet and shake the hand of David Fincher, the director who also directed Fight Club, Se7en, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, The Social Network, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, and many more.

David Fincher was awesome.  Everyone respected him on the set and he directed with a confident and knowing vision.  I was also able to talk a bunch with the two main characters, Jonathan Groff and Holt McCallany.  They both were very nice to everyone on set and I could tell they were having fun while being serious about their work.

The food on big sets is also delicious.

Anyway, that all began in 2014 during the filming of Southpaw, which aired the next year in 2015.

2018

The year is now 2018.  I moved to Colorado in 2017 and landed an Acting Teacher job in my fifth month of living here.  I was a full time teacher in PA before coming to CO & substitute teaching every day.  I have a local agent, I filmed a real estate commercial in January that is now airing locally, and did a paid student film this past November which I had a blast doing!  That crew was so fun to work with.

I had an audition today, April 4th, that I think went really well, and I have another audition tomorrow.

A long time ago I had a dream of being an actor.  As a child I had a belief that it was possible to become a paid actor, until I grew up and found out that “no-one” becomes an actor.

I’m here to tell you that it’s possible.

Your dream is possible.

Feel free to message me if you have any questions about acting or how to get involved.  If you want to talk about the movies or shows I’ve been in, message me, & I’d love to hear about your acting stories!  Comment below or email me at Kthompson7814@gmail.com.

It’s okay to feel bad

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And it’s okay to feel good.  

How long have we had this idea in America that everyone should be happy all the time?

The media portrays smiling families, good times, and happy endings, but that isn’t always the case.

You don’t need to be happy all the time To Live A Great Life.

Oftentimes we look at someone who is upset and think “Oh there must be something wrong with them.”  Why do we think something has to be wrong?  Maybe it’s okay for them to feel bad.  It’s okay for them to feel what they feel.  When we allow our feelings to come and don’t try to force them to leave, they will leave on their own.  When we try to control our emotions, they multiply.

You are not alone in your struggles.  Basically everyone at one point or another in their lifetime will experience depression, anxiety, OCD etc.

Check out this list of some of the greats who have dealt with depression and in some cases suicide:

Vincent Van Gogh, Ernest Hemingway, Ludwig Wan Beethoven, Pablo Picasso, Edgar Allen Poe, Abraham Lincoln, Isaac Newton, Friedrich Nietzsche, George Orwell, Robin Williams, Jim Carrey, Kurt Cobain, Ellen Degeneres, Johnny Depp, Eminem, Chris Evans, Jon Hamm, Angelina Jolie, Lady Gaga, Michael Phelps, Brad Pitt, J.K. Rowling, Channing Tatum, Owen Wilson, and many others.

So we can be there to support others and to support ourselves because everyone is going through something, and that’s okay.  We need to remember that everyone suffers in life, and the meaning we give our suffering can make our lives better or worse.

“You don’t need to feel great to act great.” Coach T

So how can we gain Peace of Mind through this idea of accepting our feelings as they are?

“Don’t look for peace. Don’t look for any other state than the one you are in now; otherwise, you will set up inner conflict and unconscious resistance. Forgive yourself for not being at peace. The moment you completely accept your non-peace, your non-peace becomes transmuted into peace. Anything you accept fully will get you there, will take you into peace. This is the miracle of surrender.” Eckhart Tolle

Echart Tolle

A Study…

Psychologists at the University of California Berkeley have researched and tested the idea of accepting negative emotions and have found that “people who habitually accept their negative emotions experience fewer negative emotions, which adds up to better psychological health.”

See their article Here

These psychologists have also stated that acceptance and self-compassion are two key habits to happiness.

“People who accept their emotions without judging or trying to change them are able to cope with their stress more successfully.”

My Experience

There have been multiple times where I’ve experienced overwhelming feelings.  Over time I’ve learned that I can sit and dwell in these feelings or I can try to move on.  Sometimes these feelings come back to me, but I now work on accepting them as they are.  I allow myself to feel what I’m feeling, and then let the emotions go away in their time.

I remind myself that these feelings are temporary.  They will pass, and it will be okay.  With each new day comes a choice to suppress our emotions, or to allow them to come and then go.

Smiling helps, just look in the mirror and smile.  It’s funny, I know.  Try it for a few minutes and see what happens.

I Exercise.  This is something that is known to boost endorphins which trigger a positive feeling in the body.

Or you can take some time to just breathe.  Listen to your breath, just your breath.  Find a comfortable place, let go of the wandering mind and breathe.  Listening to your breath allows you to get back to this moment, here, now.  Try that for five minutes just to see how often your mind wanders.

I am not perfect at this craft, but I enjoy the practice and think you will too!

Conclusion:

It’s okay to think & feel happy, sad, depressed, anxious, joyous, all the emotions.

Remember that feelings are temporary; they will pass, but your actions will last.

Try to be conscious of how you are thinking and feeling when you are down, and don’t allow yourself to just dwell on auto-pilot in negative feelings.  Feel what you feel, accept what you’re feeling and thinking, even wave to your feelings if you’d like, and then watch them go like cars passing by.

Peace of Mind is not just a state of relaxation.

Peace of Mind isn’t about feeling a certain way.  

It’s about feeling the way you feel.

Feeling how you feel is the greatest happiness of all.

“You can’t stop the waves (of emotions) but you can learn to surf.”

Above all, it’s about letting the mind be as it is and knowing something about how it is in this moment.  It’s not about getting somewhere else, but about allowing yourself to be where you already are. — Jon Kabat-Zin

Thanks for reading!  Please share your thoughts in the comments.

3 Reasons to Create a World Anthem and a New American National Anthem

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It’s time to create a World Anthem and change the U.S. National Anthem

I do not write this to be against the United States of America and it’s people.  I write this for the U.S., it’s people, and for the World.

3 Reasons to Create a World Anthem and New National Anthem for America

  1. The U.S. National Anthem promotes War and Brutal Competition
  2. The Anthem is highly Outdated
  3. To bring the people of the World Together
  1. The United States of America National Anthem promotes War and Brutal Competition

The American National Anthem is a War poem, promoting an “Us Against the World” mentality.  The Anthem originates from the U.S. winning a war against the British in the early 1800’s.

Francis Scott Key wrote a poem called “Defense of Fort M’Henry” in the year 1814 after the British could not conquer Fort McHenry and the American flag was still standing.  This poem (Current U.S. National Anthem) was printed in newspapers and became very popular but it wasn’t officially used until many years later.  The Navy used this poem officially in the year 1889 and called it “The Star-Spangled Banner.”

In 1916 President Woodrow Wilson wanted this Anthem to be played at all official events and in 1931 it was finally adopted as the official National Anthem of The United States of America.

War is always brutal, and it especially was in the 1800’s—Over 200 years ago… War has been going on basically since the beginning of time, but we are reaching a point in time where war is not needed anymore.  We are not living in the 1800’s or the 1900’s.  This is 2017!  This is the future that people have been dreaming of.  People in America have more rights than they have ever had, but of course there are still injustices.

There may always be conflicts but these conflicts can be solved in peaceful ways.  The peaceful path is harder.  War is the easy path. Just as negativity is easy and weeds grow on their own, positivity takes patience and persistent effort like creating a beautiful garden.  Do you want to create beauty? Or are you okay with vile as an entirety?

One step at a time—Let us begin by changing our National Anthem to an Anthem that ALL people can celebrate.

       2. The Anthem is Highly Outdated

The year is now 2017 if you forgot.  Man created time in a way that it moves forward, not backwards.  Change is inevitable.  We live in a day and age where anyone can be who they want to be.

For example, Bruce Jenner is now Caitlyn Jenner—Things like this were not happening before the 2000s, at least from famous figures.  Everyone has an opinion about all things, but have you ever thought that your opinion might be wrong?

Trump thinks all his opinions are right, which reminds me of this quote: “A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool” William Shakespeare.

Trump is a very smart business man, but he has a hard time looking forward; he wants to live in the past, like our anthem.  Some people love his arrogant confidence but he should do a little more thinking in that oval office; although his “little rocket man” comment was kind of funny.

Trump would be a great leader in the 1800’s as he is trying to “Make America Great Again,” but we don’t need to make America great again.  It already is great and it can get better if we continue to adapt and move forward.  Wise leadership is a necessity!!  Many politicians get elected due to their money, power, status and corruption, NOT their wisdom!

100 years ago Women and African Americans couldn’t vote.  Most speed limits in cities were 10 mph.  We were not even close to going to the moon.  The computer and television were not invented.  No microwaves and no sliced bread.

If we kept everything the way it has always been we would get nowhere in life.  As a human species we have the great ability to think and adapt to create a better quality of life.  Let us create a better life for all people, and begin by changing our National Anthem.

3. To bring the people of the World Together

Why?  People are still starving to death every day.  Poverty is killing children and the homeless continue to rise in numbers.

A multitude of people don’t have access to clean water and the environment is constantly being polluted.  Wars have taken away fathers and sons from families and racism has divided our world, nation, states and communities.

Has any politician changed this like some of them say they will??  Some have made more of a difference than others, but for the most part one President isn’t going to solve these problems.

We can work together to create a better future, not just in America, but in the entire world.  Conflicts will always exist, but we can learn to work through these conflicts in a positive way.

It begins with you, the individual, and it will spread as you carry on with your mind focused on how you can help another person, a community, a state and the world to become the best they can be.

I’m going to change JFK’s quote to: “Ask not what your World can do for you, ask what you can do for your World.”

I respect Colin Kaepernick for kneeling during the National Anthem and raising awareness for the oppression of minorities; yes there is racism in Francis Scott Key’s War Poem (the longer version of the American National Anthem) where he says “No refuge could save the hireling and slave – From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave.”

He says this because of the African Americans who fled to Britain with the promise of true freedom and many of those people ended up fighting for the British Navy during the War of 1812.

Kaepernick has caused a ripple effect that has influenced many athletes and others to join him in kneeling for what they believe in.  America is supposed to be the land of the free, where people of any color can come to live their best life…

I hope these conflicts can only lead us to becoming a better country and a better World that some of us can truly see in our mind’s eye.

I do appreciate the pride America’s National Anthem has, but it has caused some division instead of bringing us together as a whole.  We can appreciate our country and still want to change the anthem.  You don’t need to be for America and against the World.  You CAN be for America and for the World.

“If not us, then who?

  If not now, then when?”

  -John Lewis

P.S. Let’s change the Pledge of Allegiance too.

I encourage you to open your mind; to think outside of yourself for a bit.  Put yourself in the shoes of a minority or anyone else, and try to really see things from their point of view.

Let go of your fears.

QUESTION YOUR CERTAINTY

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

I was listening to famous blogger Mark Manson get interviewed by Marie Forleo Here when he said something that inspired this whole post.  I believe that this idea can help everyone in their daily lives.

  • “The starting point is simple, start asking WHY about everything.”

“What if I’m wrong?”      “What if my assumption is wrong?”

The more I think about this subject, the more I see how IMPORTANT it is to question ourselves.

“Don’t believe everything you think” is a quote that has impacted my life in great ways.

Author Dan Millman wrote that our thoughts are like wild monkeys stung by a scorpion.

Our minds are running all day; thoughts appear like clouds passing by, some stay longer than others, but some quickly pass by.  So how can you and I let go of these “clouds?”

1) As Manson would say, “There’s no ‘how.’  It’s all in your head.”  There is not much you can do other than try on a new perspective and ask, “What if my assumption isn’t true?” What would that mean?  And then psychically traverse the answer.

  • So write down 5 things in your life that you could potentially be wrong about.  Question those deep assumptions you’ve had about your identity for years.  For example, “I am lazy” I am not an attractive person” “I don’t know how to talk to people” “I won’t ever be happy” “The world is going to shit”

The more emotion you have behind these assumptions, the more important it is to write it down and CHALLENGE IT!

After you have written down 5 or more assumptions, go through them and write down what it would mean in your life if it were wrong.

It may not be easy but it’s worth it!  Anyway how confident can you be in your own beliefs if you’ve never challenged them?  Try to see the “other side,” and when it does appear more likely and more valid, join that side!

2) THINK THROUGH YOUR THOUGHTS to see if what you’re thinking is irrational or not.

For example:  Say that you get a little nervous to go to the gym or grocery shopping.  But why?  Because you have to step out of your COMFORT ZONE.

You are comfortable inside your apartment watching TV & the thought of leaving will disrupt your comfort – so you think..

It’s crazy how the mind can trick us to stay exactly where we are.  But if you want to do anything significant or really even just anything, you need to leave your comfort zone.  It’s worth it.  The pain you will feel later on in life due to staying in your comfort zone will be much worse than the temporary discomfort of going for what you want.

-This can relate to asking a girl/guy out.

-Performing at that open mic night you’ve been considering.

-Joining that group you’ve been thinking of joining.

-Anything that has to do with doing what you want.

People are afraid of all sorts of things & that’s okay.  You shouldn’t try to strive to be fearless, you should strive to TAKE ACTION when you are feeling afraid.

I have learned that it’s not about how I think or feel, it’s about what I do!!  

Don’t believe everything you think!  Question your assumptions and thoughts, and start TAKING ACTION!!!

Stop wasting time caring about the wrong things; things that only worry you.  Start caring about things that truly matter to you!arget=

Interview with Youtuber Denise Vlogs

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I had the pleasure of interviewing YouTube star Denise Vlogs via Skype!  Denise loves creating short horror films which you can check out HERE.

IMG_1345

She also vlogs her travels in which she has been all over the world; so if you love a good horror story and an adventure you need to check her channel out!  She has almost 100,000 YouTube subscribers and videos with over a million views.  She recently bought a one way ticket to Europe and was in the Capital of Portugal, Lisbon when I interviewed her.  For now, enjoy the q and a interview with Denise Vlogs:

  1. Hello Denise! Where are you from?

DV: “I was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York; moved to Los Angeles after graduating from Brooklyn College majoring in film production.”

2.  Where are you currently and would you like to live somewhere specific?

DV: “Lisbon, Porutgal.  If I had to settle it would be in Los Angeles.”  She knows a lot of people in Los Angeles, but is not too fond of living in the states because at the moment it is hard to be a freelancer here.

3.  What is your dream job?

DV: “Film production; writing scripts, film maker, and that being the only source of income.”

4.  Do you have a role model?  Who is it and why?

DV: “Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu.  I met him when I worked as a receptionist at Anonymous Content.”  She watched his movies in film school where he was used as an example of a great foreign director and admired for his work.

5.  Since she had lived in Los Angeles for awhile I asked her if she met any celebrities and she did:                                                                                                                                                                                     DV: “I met Snoop Dogg, Ashton Kutcher..lots of famous people and  famous YouTubers.  I was more excited to meet other YouTubers because I wanted to collaborate with them.”

6.  Tell me about a project or accomplishment that you consider to be the most significant in your career.

DV: “DV Presents-Denise Vlogs presents;  a series of short films-10-20 of them.  I love these films that focus on a story.  These are what I love to make.”  Check out these videos HERE 

7.  If you had a superpower what would it be?

DV: “Time travel—I’d warn my mom about her cancer so she would have survived; also a friend who died of the same cancer.  I’d tell myself to break up with several people.”

8.  What does your perfect day look like?

DV: “New experiences; a brand new country in a beautiful place.  When I just released a DV presents video, get a lot of money, and eat good food.”

9.  How would you spend a billion dollars?

DV: “Travel, film making, donate to charities.  I would save for 10 years and adopt a child.  Buy several properties all over the world.  Buy a citizenship in another country.  Never bring a suitcase with me everywhere I went; I’d shop wherever I went and then donate my old clothes.”

10.  What did you want to be when you grew up?

DV: “Starting at 11 I wanted to be a screen writer.  I wrote a script when was 11.  Before that I wanted to be an actress and singer, maybe I just wanted attention…I also wanted to be a meteorologist when I was really young; I was fascinated by natural disasters as a little kid.  My dad bought tons of movies, and my mom loved to watch scary movies so I would watch them with her and I really like them.  At sleepovers and with friends I would make up ghost stories with friends.  My uncle also told me he wrote a screen play when I was a young age, so that made me realize that anyone could do it!”  Her friends liked her scary stories the best!

11.  What is the hardest part about maintaining the lifestyle you live?

DV: “I want to make more money; I just make enough to get by at the moment.  Being a digital nomad can be sad having to leave people after I connect with someone.  It can get lonely being by myself, so it might be nice to settle.”

12.  What do you enjoy most about your lifestyle?

DV: “New experiences and new people I get to meet all the time.  It’s a burst of energy when you connect to a new place.  I enjoy not having to sit in a desk every day, learning new things, creating content, and hopes I’ll have more time to create more content to focus on.”

13.  What kind of computer do you have?  You probably have to edit a lot for those awesome videos!!

DV:  “I recommend the MacBook Pro to edit videos and stuff.  I have the MacBook Pro 2014.  I use adobe premier to edit but for beginners recommend iMovie.  I use photoshop sometimes and would use a desktop but I move around a lot.”

Currently Denise is working now as a freelancer.  She edits videos, consults people and companies for social media– YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, etc.  She has looked into teaching online and possibly substitute teach.  She also like to volunteer to teach English.  She has two YouTube channels DeniseVlogs and DeniseActuallyVlogs.  She uses both channels but deniseactuallyvlogs is more casual.

Follow her on Twitter @DeniseVlogs, Instagram @DeniseVlogs.  Follow her travels on snapchat at DeniseVlogs too!

If you missed it at the top here is her youtube main page!

Life is NOT about making Money

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As I was gazing at stars tonight in the pool, I had this thought…

I want to be financially free just like the next person, but this does not mean I should be living my whole life only to make money.

I spend a lot of time thinking about how I will earn my next dollar.  I think a lot of people do, and I realized that I do not want to be consumed by the thought of money.  Life is so much more than these pieces of paper we use for transactions.

So what is life about?  …It’s NOT about making money.

  • Life is about making the world better than it was before you came to this Earth.
  • Life is about having a positive influence on the lives of others.
  • Life is about finding something you truly love doing, then doing it until you become an expert!
  • Life is about spending time with people who support & love you; stop spending time with people who only bring you down.
  • Life is about the adventure.
  • Life is about finding answers to questions but also accepting that some questions won’t be answered.
  • Life is about Living.

What is life about for you?

Life is not meant to be wasted constantly thinking about the dollar bill.  Or the five, or the ten, or the twenty, fifty, not even the hundred dollar bill.  Crazy huh?

I know that money is a necessity when it comes to paying the bills and raising a family, but you can be pursuing what you love as you make money in another way (A Job) until you start getting paid for what you love doing (Your Captivating Career).

Do you truly want to spend your days consumed by the thought of money?  Or do you want to free your mind and start truly living the life meant to be lived?  The choice is yours…

Get off of the couch and go for a walk.  Call a friend or family member.  Think about how you can positively impact this world, your community, one person, and then do it!  Take time to think of what you love doing, and try to figure out how you can make a job out of it.  Appreciate and be thankful for what you have, for one day, this too shall pass.

Think it’s impossible? It’s not. More and more people are doing what they love. This is a new day, a new age, a new generation. Here is one awesome example of a person who quit their job to follow their passion:

How to Quit Your Job, Move to Paradise, and Get Paid to Change the World

Please leave a comment below if you’d like.  Let me know what Life is about for you.

     And enjoy each moment of this beautiful mystery we call Life.

6 Human Needs; Why all people do what they do

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

This post mainly comes from the ideas of the great Tony Robbins while I only add to it.

You are seeking emotions and experiences. After researching experts, I have found that there are six basic, universal needs that drive ALL human behavior. Every human being has these needs, but we each put different VALUE on these needs. Our focus on these needs will determine the direction of our life!  What need will you live for?

The six human needs include:

1) Certainty

2) Significance

3) Variety

4) Love/Connection

5) Growth

6) Contribution

Each of these needs influence every single human being’s life, and by understanding the needs that shape your behavior, you can take control of your life, and create new habits that lead you to the life you’ve been dreaming of living.

What do you think the most addictive thing in the world is???

Find out in a few paragraphs, it’s not what you think.

Before we get more into our human needs, lets look at how DECISIONS shape our destiny, and our decisions of course are intertwined with our needs.

Decision is the ultimate power. Decisions shape destiny.

There are 3 Decisions we are making EVERY moment of our lives:

1) What am I going to focus on?  Focus=feeling.  Past/present/Future…Self or others?

2) What does it(this situation/experience) mean? Is it the end or the beginning?  Are you being punished or rewarded?

3)What are your going to do? Are you going to give up or move forward?

We make these decisions consciously or unconsciously.**

Lance Armstrong for example could have focused on his cancer but he continued to focus on biking and being the best. He continued to win!

Rosa Parks.  Her focus was that she could change the world for her kids or grandkids instead of focusing on what she was told to do.  She wouldn’t go to the back of the bus & she changed the whole world!

Entrepreneur Tony Robbins also has an incredible story.  When he was a eleven years old with a very broke family and no food for Thanksgiving, a stranger came to his house on Thanksgiving to give them a turkey.  Tony’s angry father and himself had VERY different PERSPECTIVES/FOCUSES on this event that went like this:

Tony’s Father: His 3 decisions: Focus was “this is charity” What does it mean “I am worthless” What do I have to do? “Leave my family.” Which he did…

Tony’s focus:  There’s food!  What does it mean? “Strangers care about me and other people.”  What am I going to do?  “I’m going to do something to make a difference.” Six years later he started feeding families when he was 17. Slowly but surely he built a foundation and has fed millions of people all over the world.

Your FOCUS determines much of your life. Try to be intentional and conscious of what you focus on.

& The most addictive thing in the world is….

Most people will guess wrong. The answer is Problems.

**Most people find a way to feel significant by having a significant problem.  Problems are the safest way to connect with others and not be rejected. Problems are the biggest addiction in our culture.

And SiGNIFICANCE is one of the six human needs!!! Think about your life. Do you connect and feel significant through problems? And are you happy with constantly talking about problems or do you want to live a life with less complaining?

***Instead of just looking at peoples’ behaviors, see their attempts to meet their needs.***

A few insights into the 6 human needs:

1) Certainty

  • People like to be certain, to have financial security, to trust people and experiences. But too much certainty makes us bored, so we need some variety.

2) Variety

  • People like good surprises, if it’s a bad surprise they call it a problem.

3) Significance

  • We all need to feel important, special, unique..People do this in so many different ways-tattoos, religion, joining a group..etc..One of the quickest way some people feel significant is through Violence. Violent things happen each day, just watch the news; these people have a striving for significance, as well as some big mental problems..I encourage you to be significant in a positive way.  Join some great groups, read, write, travel.

4) What we really need is Connection & Love

  • Connection and love are like rain to a garden of flowers, they make us grow.  Surround yourself with people who support and love you. I am so thankful for my family because of their love. Also if you are feeling down and depressed, get a pet. Dogs will love you and are always happy to see you.  Cats are different, but they can show love to their owners as well.

Every human finds a way to meet the first 4 needs. What will your FOCUS be to meet these needs???

The next two needs create fulfillment!

5) Growth

If you don’t grow, you die. Relationships, businesses, self, etc.

  • We grow when we have something to give of value. So don’t always be thinking of yourself..I know it’s hard, but try to get out of yourself for awhile & see what you can give to others that can help them. EVERYONE has something great to contribute, but it can be very difficult to find it. Start by donating food or clothes, or doing something small for someone. It feels amazing and will help you grow. It’s funny how a selfless act will ultimately help you too.

6) To Contribute beyond ourselves

  • Growth and Contribution are intertwined. You grow by contributing.  Contribution=growth.

“The secret of living is giving.”

“It’s not about me, it’s about we.” Tony Robbins

People truly get excited to contribute once they experience it and not just talk about it.

We ALL have the same needs, but whatever need leads us will lead us to our destination.

People all try to meet the same needs, but we do it in different ways. A firefighter saves lives for significance while someone else kills a person for significance.

Try to appreciate how people are attempting to meet their needs, explore your decisions, and give.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO FOCUS ON?

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

45 Life Lessons

Posted on by in Self-Help and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .
  1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
  2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
  3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
  4. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
  5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
  6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
  7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
  8. Save for retirement, starting with your first paycheck.
  9. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
  10. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
  11. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
  12. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  13. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
  14. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
  15. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
  16. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
  17. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
  18. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
  19. Burn the candles; use the nice sheets; wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
  20. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
  21. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
  22. The most important sex organ is the brain.
  23. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
  24. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter?”
  25. Forgive everyone everything.
  26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
  27. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
  28. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
  29. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
  30. Believe in miracles.
  31. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
  32. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
  33. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
  34. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
  35. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
  36. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
  37. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
  38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
  39. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
  40. The best is yet to come.
  41. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, and show up.
  42. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
  43. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
  44. Yield.
  45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

These are all so good.  I read this a few times!  Credit to Regina Brett.  Which is your favorite??

Get more free time by using Parkinson’s Law!

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help, Successful People and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Parkinson’s Law dictates that a task will swell in perceived importance and complexity in relation to the time allotted to its completion.

We work on things with a given deadline, but if we have no deadline we will take up all sorts of time wasting it.

Example—Someone who has a leisure day with no deadlines can spend the whole day writing an easy college essay that is due the next day.  This essay should take no more than one hour, but lets see what happens…

The person wakes up slow, makes coffee and eats, showers, and 1-2 hours is gone.  They look at what they have to do for a few minutes then get distracted with social media and surfing the web for an hour.  Decide to watch Netflix for an hour or two, and the day is almost evening..

..They open up their paper and work on it for about 5 minutes before getting distracted and going back to checking out social media.  This cycle continues for hours until they finally begin and finish the paper around midnight.  The paper would have only taken at most an hour to finish, but this person believed they did not need to finish it first thing in the morning so they took all day to do it.  They did not have a specific deadline for the paper!

This is similar to a typical 9-5 workday where many people babble their days away with coworkers in pointless conversation.  There have been studies done about how much people actually work throughout the day at their 9-5 jobs and the average does actual work-related tasks about half of the time.

Useless meetings, lunch and water breaks, surfing the web and other distracting things take them away from “what they should be doing.”  And if their bosses allow it, I would do it too!  If a boss gives an employee a week to do something, that person will take the full week to lazily do that task, when it could be done in a much shorter time if given a shorter deadline. Check cartoon below↓↓↓

“Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.”  I can’t say it enough.

By assigning the right amount go time to a task, we gain back more time and the task will reduce in complexity to its natural state.

Parkinson’s Law works because people give tasks longer than they really need, for different reasons, because they have an inflated idea of how long the task will take to complete.  **You can’t realize how quickly some tasks can be completed until you test this principle.

Work smarter, not harder…when most people are working harder and not smarter.

A practical way for you to complete goals/tasks faster:

  • Make a list of your tasks for the day, week, month, etc.  and divide them up by the amount of time you think it will take to complete them.  Then write down half of that time that you first gave yourself to complete each task!  Make sure you view your deadlines just as crucial as you would if completing it for a boss.
  • Stop checking your phone and email every 15 minutes and take 45-60 minutes of focused time to only work on your main task.

When you begin applying Parkinson’s Law to your life and your tasks, you will begin to be more productive than you’ve ever imagined.

Please share and comment, letting me know your thoughts and how Parkinson’s Law has helped you!