Awaken the Ego

Because it’s sleeping..

Have you ever made decisions based on what you thought other people were thinking of you?

It happens to all of us at some point, but the funny thing is, if we knew others’ thoughts, we’d find out they probably weren’t thinking of us!

Many people rely on other people for a sense of their self-esteem and self-importance.

EGO in this article is defined as a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance. 

When we live by the ego our happiness depends on external approval. We will always be searching for more, wanting more, and never having ‘enough.’

The ego thinks in terms of how others perceive itself. The ego believes that you are successful when you have more or do more than another person. Our true self is happy when we are working on genuinely bettering ourself.

Comparison is a big disappointment & a quality of the ego. I have found myself to be much happier when I stop comparing myself to others.

Expectations can also lead to disappointment.

The moments pass you by as you await a ‘better’ future. This is a delusion that so many people fall into because when the future comes, are you enjoying it?

Or are you still awaiting a better better future? 

That’s the ego.

Why awaken ego?

Once it becomes awakened, it can’t fully go back to sleep/unconscious living.

All the answers won’t just come to you, but you will be on your way to a more intentional life, as I am on the same journey. Far from perfect but living and learning.

As you become more self-aware, aware of how you’ve been acting through your ego, you will begin to realize how much potential you really have and how much time you have been wasting on meaningless experiences.

I have wasted lots of time dwelling in wondering what others might be thinking of me. As I began to let go of what they might be thinking I have found myself feeling truly alive in bliss & liberation.

When you realize that even though your eyes have been open, you may have been asleep, you will begin to awake.

The Heartfelt Speech Awakening People to Live a Life True to Themselves!

Lyrics to the speech below!

Ladies and gentlemen of the class of ’97…

Wear sunscreen

If I could offer you only one tip for the future

Sunscreen would be it

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proven by scientists

Whereas the rest of my advice

Has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

I will dispense this advice now…

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth

Oh, never mind

You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded

But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself

And recall in a way you can’t grasp now

How much possibility lay before you

And how fabulous you really looked.

You are not as fat as you imagine

Don’t worry about the future

Or worry.

But know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind

The kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday

Do one thing everyday that scares you

Sing

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts

Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours

Floss

Don’t waste your time on jealousy

Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind

The race is long

And in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults

If you succeed in doing this, tell me how

Keep your old love letters

Throw away your old bank statements

Stretch

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life

The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives

Some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium

Be kind to your knees

You’ll miss them when they’re gone

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t

Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t

Maybe you’ll divorce at 40

Maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary

Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either

Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s

Enjoy your body

Use it every way you can

Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it

It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own

Dance

Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly

(The Awesome Chorus! Until minute 4:03)

Get to know your parents

You never know when they’ll be gone for good

Be nice to your siblings

They are the best link to your past

And the people most likely to stick with you in the future

Understand that friends come and go

But for the precious few you should hold on

Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle

Because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once

But leave before it makes you hard

Live in Northern California once

But leave before it makes you soft

Travel

Accept certain inalienable truths

Prices will rise

Politicians will philander

You too will get old

And when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young

Prices were reasonable

Politicians were noble

And children respected their elders

Respect your elders

Don’t expect anyone else to support you

Maybe you have a trust fund

Maybe you have a wealthy spouse

But you never know when either one might run out

Don’t mess too much with your hair

Or by the time you’re 40, it will look 85

Be careful whose advice you buy

But be patient with those who supply it

Advice is a form of nostalgia

Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off

Painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Explaining Precisely What Jim Carrey is trying to tell us. Plus Jim’s Illuminating Quotes.

Acting has become a gateway to enlightenment for the actor Jim Carrey.

A big influence in this awakening came from what he learned throughout and after his role of playing Andy Kaufman while filming the movie “Man On The Moon.”

As Jim played the character of Andy he realized that we are all playing roles in our day to day lives; that we make choices each day, either consciously or unknowingly, and these actions lead us to where we are right now. Jim realized that we can take conscious actions, like actors do when preparing for & playing a role, which will guide us to becoming the person/character we want to become.

Each of us can choose to be the hero of the life we are living in, but many people live life only as a product of their environment, reacting instead of acting.

Like I said, some of this realization came to Jim when he went back to being “Jim Carrey” after playing the role of Andy Kaufman for months. If he can make intentional choices to become “Andy Kaufman,” then who really is Jim Carrey?

He thought. Isn’t that just a name he has been given? Our actions are what define us and turn us into the character we are, and we are all taking several actions each day.

 

Jim has realized that he is not the name he has been given. That he is not limited to the words we humans use to describe and live “life.” Most people don’t understand this and think Jim is crazy, but he is just waking up to who we all really are and I hope you will too. This quote of Jim’s just below shows his understanding that peace is beyond words and the things we have created:

 

“The peace that we’re after lies somewhere beyond personality, beyond the perception of others, beyond invention and disguise, even beyond effort itself.”

We are all so much more than the names we are given and we can all be more than the product of our environment but most people don’t make the choice to be who they want to be.

You can.

Shakespeare said “All the world’s a stage. And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts.”

Jim is basically saying what Shakespeare said. Each day we all put an act on, whether we intentionally choose our act or not is up to us. Let these quotes guide you to taking control of your life, your “act.” Make a choice to become the character you want to be.

Below are some Jim Carrey quotes that may help you awaken to your true self and help you make choices that will lead you to living the life you dream of. Take action on your dreams. After all you are an actor of life.

“I’ve never been one to sit back and go, I’d better do what the audience wants me to do, because I don’t want to lose them.”

“It is better to risk starving to death than surrender. If you give up on your dreams, what’s left?”

“So many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality. What we really want seems impossibly out of reach so we never dare to ask the universe for it. I’m the proof that you can ask the universe for it.”

“How will you serve the world? What do they need that your talent can provide? That’s all you have to figure out.”

“The effect you have on others is the most valuable currency there is.”

“I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which, was that you can fail at what you don’t want so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.”

“As far as I can tell, it’s just about letting the universe know what you want and then working toward it while letting go of how it comes to pass.”

“I don’t believe in hope. Hope is a beggar. Hope walks through the fire, faith leaps over it.”

“Flowers don’t worry about how they’re going to bloom. They just open up, and turn toward the light and that makes them beautiful.”

“You are ready and able to do beautiful things in this world, and as you walk through those doors today, you will only have two choices: love or fear. Choose love, and don’t ever let fear turn you against your playful heart.”

“Life opens up opportunities to you, and you either take them or you stay afraid of taking them.”

“Desperation is a necessary ingredient to learning anything, or creating anything. Period. If you ain’t desperate at some point, you ain’t interesting.”

“I’m making a conscious choice to see challenges as beneficial so that I can deal with them in the most productive way.”

“When things are really bad the only thing to do is laugh.”

“You can spend your whole life imagining ghosts, worrying about your pathway to the future, but all there will ever be is what’s happening here, and the decisions we make in this moment, which are based in either love or fear.”

“To find real peace you have to let the armor go. Your need for acceptance can make you invisible in this world. Don’t let anything stand in the way of the light that shines through this form. Risk being seen in all of your glory.”

“Fear is going to be a player in your life, but you get to decide how much.”

“This is the voice of your ego. If you listen to it, there will always be someone who seems to be doing better than you.”

“Beware of the unloved, because they will eventually hurt themselves… or others.”

“Fear is writing that script. And the working title is ‘I’ll never be enough.’”

“If you aren’t in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.”

“Maybe other people will try to limit me but I don’t limit myself.”

“Originality is really important.”

“You’ll come up with your own style. That’s part of the fun.”

“I really believe in the philosophy that you create your own universe. I’m just trying to create a good one for myself.”

“There is a huge difference between a dog that is going to eat you in your mind and an actual dog that’s going to eat you.”

 “I’ve arrived at the place if I’m not taking a career risk, I’m not happy. If I’m scared, then I know I’m being challenged.”

If you know Jim Carrey you have probably heard this quote just below: 

“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.” (Is it that we all desire for more, yet when we get more there is another thing that comes to our minds that we want…Be happy now.)

“For the most sensitive among us, the noise can be too much.” (And it’s all just a bunch of noise, right?)

“My soul is not contained within the limits of my body. My body is contained within the limitlessness of my soul.”

“We had problems like all families but we had a lot of love. I was extremely loved. We always felt we had each other.”

“I refuse to feel guilty. I feel guilty about too much in my life but not about money. I went through periods when I had nothing, so somebody in my family has to get stinkin’ wealthy.”

“I’m the first to admit this whole salary thing is getting out of control. In the final analysis, it’s still about the work.”

I hope you enjoyed these illuminating quotes. I encourage you to continue learning every day as you awaken to your best self by making conscious choices. This will direct you to living as your ideal actor in this play of life. Please share and spread the message if you see what Jim Carrey is trying to tell us!!

3 Ways To Live a Life You Won’t Regret in 30 Years

Scientific research has been collected from hospice workers who have asked people on their death beds what their biggest regrets were. They came up with the top 5 things people most regret which are listed at the bottom of this page. The 3 I discuss are intertwined with the top 5 & this list can help spark the inspiration needed for you to begin living your best life! A life you can reflect on daily and you won’t regret it years from now.

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Dance like no one’s watching 😉

Number 1) Do what you Love!

Don’t waste your life spending all your time at a job you hate! Try out all sorts of things to see what you enjoy doing most. If someone is an expert in the subject you love then you can too! It’s possible. This article can help you figure out what you really would like to do in life.

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Great times in Venezuela!

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Spring Break 2015

Forbes discusses statistics here where 71% of employees in America hate their jobs… So most people would rather spend their entire life working a job they hate just so they can keep living, which is to keep working until they can possibly retire. Are you living to work or working to live? Choose to live now.

When you do what you love you feel better about yourself & have a stronger connection with a higher purpose. Take time out of your day to do more of what you love!

2) Don’t live for the approval of others.

“There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” Aristotle

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Paris 2013

Many people never follow their dreams because they are so afraid of what other people will think about them. Someone whose main goal in life is to impress other people will one day end up reflecting on so many meaningless interactions that could have been spent in a joyous more fulfilling way. The funny thing is, no matter what you do or how nice you are people will still disagree with you. People will criticize, complain & try to bring you down.

Are you choosing to live small? Or are you letting the light that is within all of us shine?

If you live based off of other people’s opinions you will never be right. There will always be someone who finds fault in what you choose to do so you need to do work that matters to you! Allow your beliefs to guide you, not anyone else’s.

3) Make A Choice

“Not making a choice is still making a choice.” Unknown

When you don’t choose, you are making the choice Not to choose! You are leaving the situation up to fate instead of taking control of it yourself.

You are making choices every single day! But most of the choices you make are habitual such as “Do I stay with my job or take the risk of following my dream?

Have you asked yourself that question?^^

You have a choice about your job. You have a choice with who your friends are. You have a choice about your relationship. 

When you stay with someone or stay in a place that you dread, it’s time for some change. Where do you feel like you’re being called? What would you do if you could spend your days doing anything you want? I’m sure there are opportunities to get experience & get paid to do what you love.

Feel free to email me if you are wondering how you can begin living a life that you truly love.

Make a choice. Act on that choice then let it go & move on. There are more choices to be made. If you never choose, you’ll be exactly where you are for your entire life…

The choice is yours.

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Cheers Dublin, Ireland

How do you make a choice?

Make choices that lead you closer to where & who you want to be and what you want to achieve.

“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” Nelson Mandela

“Everything in your life is a reflection of a choice you have made. If you want a different result, make a different choice.” Anonymous

“Your life is a result of the choices you make. If you don’t like your life, it is time to start making better choices.” Anonymous

“No matter what the situation, remind yourself, I have a choice.” Deepak Chopra

“Ignore the noise and follow your own choice.” Anonymous

“It is our choices….that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” J.K. Rowling

“Life is the sum of all your choices.”Anonymous

•Do what you love. It’s better to fail at what you love doing than regret not doing it later.

Don’t live for the approval for others. People will criticize you no matter what.

Make a choice. Don’t allow fear to control your choices. Be guided by Love.

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Family 🙂

Top 5 things people regret most when on their death beds:

1) “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.”

2) “I wish I had stayed in touch with friends.”

3) “I wish I had let myself be happier.”

4) “I wish I had the courage to express my true self.”

5) “I wish I lived a life true to my dreams instead of what others expected of me.”

Listen to a TedTalk that discusses this subject & a few things you can do to live happier & longer.

Share this article if you are going to live a life you won’t regret!

The Basis for Global Equality & The One Thing That Will Truly Transform The World

There are so many things we all make a necessity that aren’t a necessity,” I wrote in a journal a few months ago…

This led me to asking notwhat does the world need most?” Because the world will be fine with or without humans. But “what do we, as humans, actually need to survive & evolve?” …Food, Sleep…& Clean Water even more so, which millions of people don’t have access to.

What blew my mind even more was that about 20 minutes before I thought & wrote about human necessities, I was thirsty, but didn’t drink the filtered bottled water next to my bed because I had refilled it a day or two before & thought “this is old.”

Minutes later in the moment I was writing about water I had an earnest realization about how much myself & many others take any type of water for granted. So I drank the water & it tasted, like water. A yearning was also sparked in me to raise awareness on the water crisis & help in any way I can.

This post is primarily meant to raise awareness on the water crisis going on in the world, but it may also open your mind up to a new way of thinking. Food & water are a privilege that many of us take for granted.

Some water statistics pulled from multiple sites:

• Every minute a newborn dies from infection caused by lack of safe water and an unclean environment. (WHO, 2015) (wateraid.org)

• 1 in 10 people lack access to clean water. (charitywater.org)

• 2.3 billion people don’t have a decent toilet & 31% of schools don’t have clean water. (WHO/UNICEF Joint Monitoring Programme (JMP) Report 2017) (wateraid.org)

•By 2025, half of the world’s population will be living in water-stressed areas. (http://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/drinking-water)

• Worldwide, 1 out of every 5 deaths of children under 5 is due to a water-related disease. (thewaterproject.com)

•More statistics here: https://thewaterproject.org/water-scarcity/water_stats

What is the one thing that will help transform us & the world we live in? …

Unconditional Love

I know there are numerous amounts of issues that need to be resolved on this planet. Not “our” planet, because we don’t own it, but they are all important & can be resolved in time through the means of unconditional love.

I believe creating clean water systems & giving people access to clean water is one of the most important needs for people as a whole. I know equality at every level in the world is out of balance, but it is especially out of balance for those who don’t have access to a human’s most basic survival needs. Without clean water people are constantly in survival mode, can never grow, & are dying without ever being able to enjoy many parts of life we take for granted.

Water is a beginning solution for growth, just like flowers, plants, vegetables & so many forms of what life is made of. Why don’t we share the joy of water with others? We’ve seen where fear has taken the human race. Why not give love a chance?

Love, unconditional love is what is needed to transform hearts & minds which in turn will transform the world. Giving without expecting anything in return. Giving with joy. & yes, to the pessimistic, the unconditional love a person gives will often be misused, but what you can’t currently see are the seeds being planted from unconditional love. These seeds will one day blossom into beautiful flowers as we & the world transform.

World peace is a possibility. Your fear is what holds you back from thinking it is a possibility…Think about ways in which you can live in a state of love, unconditional love, which is an action…

Patience is an action. Kindness is an action. Not boasting or being proud is an action. Not dishonoring others is an action. Being selfless is an action. Not being easily angered is an action. Not keeping record of wrongs is an action. Not delighting in evil but rejoicing in the truth is an action. Always protecting, trusting, hoping & persevering are actions. Love never fails as Corinthians gives us these traits of love.

Do I fail at loving unconditionally? Yes, often. But I work on it. I remind myself to look toward the traits of love & think about how I can act with unconditional love. We might not feel like being patient, but we can still choose to be patient. Love is an action, not a thought.

Anyway! I took hours to research water non-profit organizations & found many that seem great & reliable. In the end, wherever I donate to, I can’t know whether my money will go to helping build a sustainable water system or be given to an employee who is working to resolve the water crisis. Either way I know it will go toward a good cause & it will help people. (I looked up the statistics for how much of each organization’s donation go to helping others & how much goes to employees—Most use 90% to help and 10% for administration/work related—At least the ones I mention.)

I found that charitywater.org is the most reliable & popular water non-profit, but I donate & want to get more involved with waterforpeople.org as I see their potential & hope to work with an up & coming non-profit organization. I want to raise more awareness on this crisis & hopefully one day go out & physically work to build clean water systems & create sustainable plans for communities.

Another water non-profit I think is good is wateraid.org.

water.org is another popular water non-profit that is doing amazing things but I am not sure how to think about the loans they are giving to people in need of clean water…I want to be part of a group that gives & doesn’t expect anything in return for it, but someone could explain the pros of the loans?

There are a million, maybe billions of issues we have as humans, so whatever cause you are helping with, you are appreciated. I believe that the things done in authentic unconditional love will ultimately be the things that transform us & the world around us.

Your genuine desire to help will be what changes this world.

What would you do if you didn’t have to worry about Money?

What would you really do?

How would you spend your days?

Cancun

Took this picture as I enjoyed my time in Cancun Mexico

This might be the most important question you ask yourself on your journey toward happiness.

I’ve read that between 70-90% of all people are going to a job they hate. Are you part of that large percentage?

So think about it. Continue dwelling on those questions until you come up with what you really want to do. It may take days, weeks, months or even years to find out what you really want to do, so be patient-or be impatient and settle for a job you hate.

Don’t disregard your first instinct. If it is something such as acting, writing, traveling the world, being a professional athlete, teaching, painting then that is wonderful. It can be anything! Too many people look past their true dreams because society has driven this limited view into us. We have been told that our dreams are not actually possible by authority, then we don’t question them, so we settle.

For years I have asked myself this question, and one of my instinctual thoughts has always been “acting.” I didn’t know how it would happen, but I knew that it is something I would like to do. As I’ve continued to dwell on what I want, acting opportunities began to arise. I’ve been in multiple movies, TV shows and commercials, have met many famous people on sets and I am currently working as an Acting Teacher.

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I continue to listen to life and adapt as well, as our passions can change throughout the years. I have been blogging for a few years, and a few months ago I got an opportunity to become an intern for the best-selling author, Ryan Holiday. I have published posts for one his websites, done research, editing, but most importantly (after having faith) I put in a lot of focused hours into the work! Your dream is possible.

“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.” MLK Jr.

I never knew how it would all happen, and it is still happening, but I had faith that it would happen.

You don’t need to know HOW it will happen!

You just need to know what it is you actually want, and then believe it is possible. I found out some of the powers of the mind and the power of life at some point in college, and I have been trusting it ever since. Instinct…

Intuition: Life is talking to you. Are you listening?

If you aren’t sure how to listen to your intuition, no need to worry, intuition can be practiced and improved upon.

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Books!!!!

Some ways to improve intuition:

•Meditation: “Think Less to Live More

•Spend time in nature. Shut off your mind & observe the beauties of life.

•Read books and other content on developing intuition. 

Developing & listening to intuition has been one of the characteristics that has helped many of the happiest & most successful people live out their dreams.

The Myth of Perfection

As I was reading a book an acquaintance sent me, Clear Quiet Mind, I came across a section in the book from Chapter 7, The Myth of Perfection, that I believe is very helpful for accepting our imperfections and living with peace of mind in a World that is constantly telling us to be “perfect.”

After reading this chapter on the myth of perfection I googled “myth of perfection” and found that many people have written on this subject: The Huffington post, Professors, TEDTalks, etc. It is a popular subject, so it must be important to discuss. 

Here I break down what I find from these multiple sources with practical ways of accepting our imperfections from Clear Quiet Mind, which can help you get past your myth of perfection to living a life with more peace of mind. Enjoy.

Dictionary definitions of perfect include: “Having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be.”

“Completely free from faults or defects, or as close to such a condition as possible.”

Why do so many of us strive for an impossible feat which only leads us to disappointment? Why do we judge others when they make a mistake, but are forgiving for our own faults?

Are your role models perfect? Who are your role models? If they are a superhero from a movie or book, then that’s just not realistic.

A TED Talks speaker, Jim Hill, speaks of his former unrealistic expectations of himself and of others here.

He says, “Ive been wrong about role models all along. They don’t have to be perfect. How could they be perfect? They’re people.”

He goes on to speak about how no one is “perfect” all the time. We’re people. We’re flawed, and that is okay. After someone told him he was a good role model, he thought of all the reasons why he was not a good role model, but he says, “But if I could be a good role model for this slice of time, well then maybe all my role models could be perfect in slices of time.” 

Instead of judging a person off of one bad thing they did, or maybe something they didn’t do, we can look at the slices of their lives that are inspiring to us: A characteristic of theirs, an achievement, an attitude, etc. When we chase perfection in ourselves and in others we only end up beating ourselves up, or others up (verbally usually), because we all fall short.

I want to be perfect just like you do, so how can we accept this inevitable fact of being imperfect?

Practical techniques from Clear Quiet Mind are next, but one way the speaker Jim helped himself was by practicing recognizing that his friends aren’t perfect, but they are pretty awesome at times, so he looked at the positive traits in them instead of focusing on any negative. He now tries to look at everyday people as role models, none of them are perfect, but they have slices of perfection woven into them. He says that doing this has let him off the hook of perfection.

An incredibly helpful way to release the myth of perfection is to understand that no one is perfect or ever will be, but we can look at the good qualities in others life and look up to those qualities.

Author Kevin Schoeninger also has great ideas and ways on how to handle this myth of perfection. He goes a little deeper on this subject by diving into ways to recognize when we are viewing things from a myth of perfection and then ways to release the myth of perfection.

Remember, we all struggle at times with this myth of perfection. Don’t beat yourself up for not being perfect.

Kevin says things like:

“Do you avoid taking risks in business because you think you might fail?”

“The Myth of Perfection is an invisible line that is impossible to measure up to.”

“When have you done enough? “By what standards can these be judged—and, who says so?”

“Is it really important for you and/or your kids or be busy, productive, and perfect all the time? Does that make for a happy and healthy life?”

“What if these standards of perfectionism are arbitrary, illusory, and moving targets that keep you locked in the stress of never being good enough or worthy enough for what you really want?”

The bottom line is that ‘perfection’ is a myth. What you see when you step back and observe life more objectively is not perfection, but ‘diversity.’ Life is infinitely diverse. Diversity is a rule here on Earth. There are over seven billion different human bodies, sets of skills, habits, lifestyles, preferences, and personalities—and countless other lifeforms, each with their own unique characteristics.”

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3 ways to recognize The Myth of Perfection

(All quoted examples below are from Chapter 7 in Kevin’s Book, Clear Quiet Mind, pages 63-74)

“The myth of perfection needs to be made conscious before you can let it go and choose another outlook. Until you recognize it and can pause it as it arises, you’ll be a slave to its mythical power.”

The first way to let go of any limiting perspective is to recognize what you’re doing, Kevin says.

1) Black and White thinking

Example: “A person is a ‘good person’ or a ‘bad person.’”

“Actions are either ‘right’ or ‘wrong’”

“This just isn’t true. Every person is a diverse mix of different intentions, thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. There are no 100% good or bad people. No one is 100% percent anything.”

“Actions can only be judged in context-yes even the ‘bad ones,’ like stealing, lying, and taking a life(example just below). What if these actions were in the service of a greater good?” 

(Example)—“Would you lie to a Nazi about hiding a Jewish family in your attic? Would you steal their gun if they barged in and were trying to use it? Would you kill them to save innocent lives? Perhaps?”

*”Life presents itself in a rainbow of different colors and shades. Black and white thinking just doesn’t represent Reality. It’s important to view everything, every action, and everyone in their uniqueness within the complex contexts in which they appear.”

2) Always, Never, and Should

“This kind of thinking disregards the truth that all things in this physical world of time and space change and grow. Circumstances change and require different responses. We all change. Life is always changing. Life requires adaptation.”

…“Yet, we tend to label things as if they are unchanging. We say things like, ‘you always…’ and ‘I never…’ to judge others and justify ourselves.”

“‘Should’ is an equally fallible concept. We think that people should follow the rules, until they break them, create something new and amazing, and become famous for it. Then, in retrospect, they were courageous or creative geniuses.”

What if minorities and women never stood up for their rights and just followed the rules? There were laws that women couldn’t vote and that people could own slaves..How unbelievable is that? What good would happen if we didn’t break rules that are meant to be broken?

“We think that people should work until they are 65—yet, we admire those who can retire early. We think that we should long for retirement, yet those who stay engaged and active in purposeful work seem to have the most fulfilling, healthy, and happy lives.”

“Discernments about what is good, right, and valuable can only be made within the ever-changing contexts in which they occur. So, check yourself for the words always, never, and should. See if you can notice the arbitrary standards behind these statements. What if these are unnecessarily stressing you out or creating conflict?”

3) Comparison and Nitpicking

“We are brought up to compare—and this naturally leads to critical judgments if we or others don’t measure up.”

“A current example of this is the notion of ‘political correctness.’ This concept is one of the most arbitrary markers for what is good and bad. Political correctness clearly is about what is most important to the group with which you identify. It has no absolute value on its own.”

“In U.S. politics, as people congregate around ‘whatever Democrats do is bad’ or ‘whatever Republicans do it bad.’ This type of thinking leads to all sorts of contradictory and conflicting judgments…Life doesn’t offer absolute answers”

The bottom line is that people, things, and actions can only be discerned within the complex contexts in which they occur. Quick and easy, black and white judgments are inaccurate to how life actually presents itself. Life is infinitely diverse.

4 powerful techniques on releasing The Myth of Perfection

1) Notice Exceptions and Alternatives

“Notice exceptions to the rule you’re applying.” Kevin’s idea is that we are around imperfect people all the time, friends, family, etc, but we still love them for who they are.

He says, “For example, do you think so and so is beautiful even though he or she is ‘overweight?’ Can you think of a time when a ‘good person’ had a ‘lapse in judgment?’ Can you remember a time when the point you are now disagreeing with was true?”

“Notice the variety of possible ways you can look at the same situation. By momentarily adopting different points of view, it helps release you from the stress and tyranny of any one perspective.”

“At a minimum, it can lead you to say, ‘Maybe there are a variety of ways of looking at this situation.”

2) Refute Irrational Ideas

Our ideas, our self-talk, whether rational or irrational will impact our emotions, and our emotions motivate our actions. Kevin discusses how the psychologist Albert Ellis wrote about this, identifying common irrational beliefs that “launch us into stressful feelings which result in poor coping behaviors.”

Some of these adapted irrational beliefs include: “I must have love and approval for me to feel good, I must be flawlessly competent, successful, and perfect to deserve good things, My happiness and suffering are entirely dependent upon external events, Anything unknown, uncertain, or potentially dangerous is scary, What happened in the past determines what will happen now.”

There may be truth in some of these ideas for you, but “it’s how you use these ideas against yourself that’s decisive,” Kevin says, “When you attach to them as strong beliefs, they limit how you view yourself and your possibilities.”

“Certainly, you don’t control everything that happens, but you can control how you interpret, relate to, and respond to what happens.

“Ellis discovered that, if you can refute your irrational ideas, you can interrupt the chain of reaction, and create a new outcome. If you reframe your thinking, you will feel and act differently. By doing this, you become stress-resistant and stress-resilient.”

Kevin discusses Ellis’s 5 Steps to Refute Irrational ideas which you can read more about here in Ellis’s ABC Model

3) Ask yourself, ‘Am I Coming from Love or Fear?’

“Anytime you’re feeling critical or judgmental toward yourself or others ask this question: Am I coming from love or fear?”

“The root of the myth of perfection is fear of vulnerability— that ‘I am vulnerable if I’m not perfect.’

“The cure for fear is first identifying your fear and acknowledging it, then deciding if it needs to be acted on or not. This helps respond appropriately to what is happening. Perhaps your fear is alerting you to something that needs to be done? If so, how can you address your fear by taking appropriate action? If not, can you let that fear go?”

Good questions to ask fear: ‘What am I afraid might happen? Is that likely or am I exaggerating that possibility? What actions do I really need to take? Is it possible that nothing needs to be done except letting go of fear and seeing things in a more realistic empowered way?’”

“Once you’ve identified necessary actions or decided that you may be exaggerating risk to protect feelings of vulnerability, you can move toward love.”

“On the love side, you can ask, ‘How can I be more loving and compassionate toward myself and others in this situation? What would ease fear? What would help things work out well for all concerned? How can I initiate or participate in this positive outcome?’”

“In moments of fear and vulnerability, what would someone who loves you unconditionally, exactly as you are, say to you or do? How can you apply this principle to how you relate to yourself and others?”

Love is a response that naturally arises when you see the real needs of yourself and others in any situation. Love desires the best for all concerned. Love is your natural response when you are free from fear. When you love, instead of criticizing and blaming, you can observe and discern what needs to be done.”

4) Observe and Accept What Is Actually Happening

“In moments of challenge, vulnerability, and fear, is it possible to set aside all mental chatter, all stories and judgments, and simply be an objective witness to what is happening? … It is possible with practice to do this, to free your mind.

“Remember your skills of mindfulness, acceptance, and detachment. Is it possible to mindfully observe what is happening, accept it as it is, and let go of judging people and events as good or bad? Is it possible to see others and situations innocently, as if for the first time, without prejudice? —To help do this you might use the First Seat of Consciousness(technique): — Observe the situation from a perspective above and behind your head. Imagine yourself sitting up there, looking down on yourself, others, and the situation as a whole.”

The technique above reminds me of the Stoic technique of “taking a view from above.

You can imagine being in the sky, on a cloud, looking down at yourself and all of life, which can get you out of your own thoughts.

“I encourage you to try these techniques to release the myth of perfection in situations in which you are harshly judging yourself or others.”

Kevin’s book is very useful in helping people achieve an inner peace through practical techniques. I have underlined almost every single word throughout this book as I read it. As I read the book, part of me wanted the next page to not connect with me so I didn’t have to underline it, but it kept happening!

If you would like the full book you can buy it here from Amazon for $15

5 Life-Changing Takeaways from the Book, “Way Of The Peaceful Warrior”

Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives

Book Written By Dan Millman

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Dan signing my Peaceful Warrior book!

Click on Dan’s name above to go to his website & learn more about him. (Also can scroll down to go straight to the 5 life-changing takeaways if you’d like).

Growing wise through personal and spiritual experiences, this story follows a World Champion Gymnast, Dan, who seemed to “have it all” in the eyes of society.  Even though he had everything he desired in the physical realm, he was still not happy.

I think many people can relate to this^.  We get what we think we want and then find out that it doesn’t bring lasting fulfillment. We hear about rich & famous people committing suicide, although many people often desire that famous/rich life. Dan is still alive & well today, but he went through many struggles to be able to live life beyond his ego.

I feel good, sometimes I don’t, ay,” said Drake in his popular song “God’s Plan.”

Everyone feels bad at times, no matter how much ‘success’ they have in this world. And it’s okay to feel bad, even though the media only portrays happy people having a good time. Remember that what you see on tv usually isn’t an accurate example of real life.  You can check out an article I wrote on accepting our feelings by Clicking Here.

Anyway, one night, while Dan was still in college, he went to a gas station after waking up in the middle of the night.  He met a unique old man who he named Socrates later on. (“Socrates” never told Dan his real name).

Socrates became Dan’s guru/mentor/teacher. Helping to enlighten Dan, Socrates teaches him many things throughout the book that ultimately opens Dan’s mind and allows him to awaken; to be happy now without a reason.  Like many people in the World today, Dan was living through his ego before he met Socrates.  He pursued worldly pleasures & accomplishments only to find out that those “fulfilling” moments don’t last.  Led by his teacher, Socrates, Dan is able to experience life beyond his ego, and live in peace.

The “living in peace” phrase just created another thought through me; we always say Rest in Peace when someone dies, but why don’t we ever say Live in Peace when we are living??

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Way of the Peaceful Warrior was one of the first books that had a big impact on my life.  I read it for the first time when I was around the age of 19, and have continued to read it again & again.

After I finished reading this book for the first time it immediately became my favorite book, and remains my favorite to this day. It opened up my mind to new ideas & a different way of viewing & living life. Way of the Peaceful Warrior has helped me live joyfully in the present moment, to be happy now without reason, to focus on things that really matter, to take action instead of dwelling in thought, to live non-judgmentally, & to live life in love.

I do not always remain in this state of bliss, but when I accept my feelings & situations as they are, this brings me peace. I shared this earlier, but click here if you’d like to read an article on this.

The author, Dan Millan, said he wrote this book “to inspire, uplift, and to remind readers of life’s bigger picture & higher promise.”  This book definitely inspired me & gave me more insight into the bigger picture of life.

Live the moment

“Be happy now, without reason, or you’ll never be happy.”

~I truly believe that this book should be read throughout schools all around the world.  The ideas & ways of thinking this book explains could benefit the education system & our future tremendously~

In this post I will summarize some of the main points of the Way of the Peaceful Warrior. I will discuss how I have been using what I’ve learned from this book, will provide you with many of my favorite quotes from the book that relate to each takeaway & I’ve added some thought provoking quotes from the book at the end. Thank you for reading & Enjoy!

**I also want to encourage you to not just read this, but to put these ideas into practice. Ask yourself, “How can I apply this to my life?” These life-changing ideas need to be more than just read. Be patient when practicing these, & continue to remind yourself of these ideas throughout your days for them to become second nature.**

1) BE HAPPY NOW, WITHOUT REASON.

  • Millman’s words helped me see that happiness lies in the journey, not in the destination.  Many people are working at jobs only to make money for retirement.  Retirement does not equal happiness. I have used this knowledge to do more of what I love & to practice being fully present in each moment.  I am able to enjoy the ‘little things’ in life, such as a cup of coffee, a book, playing basketball, teaching, hanging out with family/friends, and the list goes on.

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Why waste half your life doing things you don’t enjoy doing if you have an opportunity to do something you enjoy?

Happiness happens now, in this present moment.  The future never really comes, the future only happens as another present moment.

Here are great quotes from the book that can open your eyes to being happy now, without reason:

* “‘What do I do then, now? Where do I go from here?’ Dan asked Socrates.

‘Who cares?’ He yelled gleefully.  ‘A fool is ‘happy’ when his cravings are satisfied. A warrior is happy without reason.  That’s what makes happiness the ultimate discipline—above all else I have taught you.’”

“Reality never matched their dreams; happiness was just around the corner — a corner they never turned. And the source of it all was the human mind.”

“There is no need to search; achievement leads to nowhere. It makes no difference at all, so just be happy now! Love is the only reality of the world, because it is all One, you see. And the only laws are paradox, humor and change. There is no problem, never was, and never will be. Release your struggle, let go of your mind, throw away your concerns, and relax into the world. No need to resist life, just do your best. Open your eyes and see that you are far more than you imagine. You are the world, you are the universe; you are yourself and everyone else, too! It’s all the marvelous Play of God. Wake up, regain your humor. Don’t worry, just be happy. You are already free!” 

“Sometimes sorrow, sometimes joy. But beneath it all remember the innate perfection of your life unfolding. That is the secret of unreasonable happiness.” 

“You Don’t need a reason to be happy. If you do that reason can be taken away.” 

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“And so I awoke to reality, free of any meaning or any search. What could there possibly be to search for? All of Socrate’s words had come alive with my death. This was the paradox of it all, the humor of it all, and the great change. All searches, all achievements, all goals, were equally enjoyable, and equally unnecessary.” 

“Act happy, be happy, without a reason in the world. Then you can love, and do what you will.”

“The secret of happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less.”

2) You are much more than what you think

&

Live in the Present.

  • Our thoughts limit our experience.  When you can let go of your thoughts, you can be fully alive in the present moment.  The answers you seek lie beyond thought.

“My name doesn’t matter; neither does yours.  What is important is what lies beyond names and beyond questions.”

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“The birth of the mind is the death of the senses” 

^^ I’ve been realizing this more & more lately that we are most alive when we are not dwelling in thoughts.  We can take time to have rational thoughts, but take some time to meditate in nothingness.  Let go of your thoughts by focusing on your external environment.  Tap into your senses. What do you see? Hear? Smell? Taste? Feel?  Try to do this for at least a few minutes.

When you are only in your mind, thinking, you are never fully in the present moment. Practice focusing your attention to things outside of you.

* “Satori is the warrior’s state of being; it occurs at the moment when the mind is free of thought, pure awareness; the body is active, sensitive, relaxed; and the emotions are open and free.”

“Remember, every-moment satori.”

“The warrior is Here, Now.”

“You have to ‘lose your mind’ before you can come to your senses.” 

“Stay in the present. You can do nothing to change the past, and the future will never come exactly as you plan or hope for.  The warrior is here, now. Your sorrow, your fear & anger, regret & guilt, your envy and plans and cravings live only in the past, or in the future.”

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“Your business is not to ‘get somewhere’ — it is to be here.

“You have been immortal since before you were born and will be long after the body dissolves. The body is Consciousness; never born; never dies; only changes. The mind — your ego, personal beliefs, history, and identity — is all that ends at death.”

^^This quote reminds me of the philosophy stoicism. I wrote a post about it that you can check out by Clicking Here.

3) Life is much more than what you can think.

  • This book helped me view the external environment without judging it. Instead of looking outside & thinking “Ooo I love or hate this weather. There is a bird & a tree, and wow that car is going really fast,” I practice just looking outside & dwelling on what is, letting thoughts come & then go like passing clouds. I practice not judging things around me, seeing them just as they are, with no thinking needed. I am not like this all the time, but it is good to practice this technique!

“You now see everything through a veil of associations about things, projected over a direct, simple awareness. You’ve ‘seen it all before’; it’s like watching a movie for the twentieth time. You see only memories of things, so you become bored. Boredom, you see, is fundamental non-awareness of life; boredom is awareness, trapped in the mind. You’ll have to lose your mind before you can come to your senses.”

“You’ve become bored to things because they exist only as names to you. The dry concepts of mind obscure your direct perception.”

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“Like most people, you’ve been taught to gather information from outside yourself; from books, magazines, experts.  Like this car, you open up and let the facts pour in.  Sometimes the information is premium and sometimes it’s low octane.  You buy your knowledge at the current market rates, much like you buy gasoline.  Like this gas tank, you are overflowing with preconceptions; full of useless knowledge.  You hold many facts and opinions, yet know little of yourself.  Before you can learn, you’ll have to first empty your tank.

4) Actions are more important than thoughts.

“Your thoughts are like wild monkeys stung by a scorpion.”

Don’t believe everything you think; I have heard this phrase many times & it relates to this idea.

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We can’t always control what we think, but we do have control of our actions.

Yes, try to think positive & focus on the best, but don’t try to force thoughts away. Embrace them; let it come & then let them go like clouds passing by.

“You don’t need to control emotion,” Socrates said. “Emotions are natural, like passing weather. Sometimes it’s fear, sometimes sorrow or anger. Emotions are not the problem. The key is to transform the energy of emotion into constructive action.”

“Old urges continue to arise, but urges do not matter; only actions do. A warrior is as a warrior does.”

“. . Action always happens in the present, because it is an expression of the body, which can only exist in the here and now. But the mind is like a phantom that lives only in the past or future. It’s only power over you is to draw your attention out of the present.”

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Paying attention is also an action, and one of the most important actions:

“A Zen student asked his roshi the most important element of Zen.  The roshi replied, ‘Attention.’ 

‘Yes, thank you,’ the student replied. ‘But can you tell me the second most important element?’ And the roshi replied, ‘Attention.’”

Practice paying attention.

“Ultimately you will learn to meditate your every action.”

“Use whatever knowledge you have but see its limitations. Knowledge alone does not suffice; it has no heart. No amount of knowledge will nourish or sustain your spirit; it can never bring you ultimate happiness or peace. Life requires more than knowledge; it requires intense feeling and constant energy. Life demands right action if knowledge is to come alive.” 

“Full attention to every moment is my desire and my pleasure. Attention costs no money; your only investment is training.”

5) On Life & Death.

* “Experts devote their life to training. Masters devote their training to life.”

“I’ve tried to show you by example that a warrior’s life is not about imagined perfection or victory; it is about love. Love is the warrior’s sword; wherever it cuts, it gives life, not death.”

* “Everyone tells you what’s good for you. they don’t want you to find your own answers. they want you to believe theirs.”

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* “‘Why worry? Better to live until you die.  I am a warrior; my way is action,’ Socrates said. ‘I am a teacher, I teach by example.  Someday you too may teach others as I have shown you—then you’ll understand that words are not enough; you too must teach by example, and only what you’ve realized through your own experience.’”

“The World out there, is a school, Dan.  Life is the only real teacher.  It offers many experiences, and if experience alone brought wisdom and fulfillment, then elderly people would all be happy, enlightened masters

..But the lessons of experience are hidden.  I can help you learn from experience to see the world clearly, and clarity is something you desperately need right now.  Your intuition knows this is true, but your mind rebels; you’ve experienced much, but you’ve learned little.”

“Think of death as a transformation — a bit more radical than puberty, but nothing to get particularly upset about.” 

“Death is not sad; the sad thing is that most people don’t really live at all.”

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“Where are you? Here. What time is it? Now. What are you? This moment.”

“You fear death and crave survival. You want Forever, you desire Eternity. In your deluded belief that you are this ‘mind’ or ‘spirit’ or ‘soul,’ you find the escape clause in your contract with mortality.” 

“Wake up! If you knew for certain that you had a terminal illness – if you had precious little time left to make use of your life and consider who you are, you’d not waste time on self-indulgence or fear, lethargy or ambition.  You do have a terminal illness – it is death. Be happy now, without reason – or you never will be at all.”

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Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed these book notes as much as I enjoyed the book.  I think many people can relate to this incredible story.

Let us be happy now, without reason, and we will live our best life.

You can purchase The Way of the Peaceful Warrior book from Amazon by clicking here if you’d like.

More thought provoking quotes from the book:

* “So I’m a fool, huh?” Says Millman.  Socrates responds with, “We’re all fools together.  It’s just that a few people know it; others don’t.”

“Your mind is your predicament. It wants to be free of change, free of pain, free of the obligations of life and death.  But change is a law, and no amount of pretending will alter that reality.”

“Enlightenment is not an attainment, it is a realization. And when you wake up, everything changes and nothing changes.” 

“How do you know you haven’t been asleep your whole life?  How do you know you’re not asleep right now?”

“Understanding is the one-dimensional comprehension of the intellect. It leads to knowledge. Realization is three-dimensional — a simultaneous comprehension of head, heart, and instinct. It comes only from direct experience.” 

“Focus all your energy not on struggling with the old, but on building the new.” 

“Embody what you teach, and teach only what you have embodied.”

“Stress happens when the mind resists what is.”

“There are no ordinary moments!”

*Story about a younger traveler, Milarepa who has been seeking enlightenment everywhere.  He eventually sees an old man carrying a heavy sack down a mountain & thinks the man knows the answer to his question… 

Milarepa says, “‘Old man, please tell me what you know. What is enlightenment?’ The old man smiled at him for a moment, and swung the heavy burden off his shoulders, and stood straight.

‘Yes, I see!’ Cried Milarepa. ‘My everlasting gratitude. But please, one question more. What is after enlightenment?’

Smiling again, the old man picked up the sack once again, slung it over his shoulders, steadied his burden, and continued on his way.”

I had to read this story^ a few times before I understood it. I hope you can see it.

“Life is not suffering; it’s just that you will suffer it, rather than enjoy it, until you let go of your mind’s attachments and just go for the ride freely, no matter what happens.”

“If you don’t get what you want, you suffer; if you get what you don’t want, you suffer; even when you get exactly what you want, you still suffer because you can’t hold on to it forever.”

“Reading the future is based on a realistic perception of the present.  Don’t be concerned about seeing the future until you can clearly see the present.”

“Meditating an action is different from doing it. To do, there must be a doer, a self-conscious someone performing.  But when you meditate an action, you’ve already released all thoughts, even the thought of, ‘I.’ There’s no ‘you’ left to do it.  In forgetting yourself, you become what you do, so your action is free, spontaneous, without ambition, inhibition, or fear.’”

“The journey is what brings us happiness not the destination.”

I hope you enjoyed the quotes as well as the summary! Now it’s time to put what you’ve learned into practice! Start today, ask “How can I apply these ideas to my daily life?” Let these ideas sink in to who you are.

I also recommend reading Dan’s second & third books in the Peaceful Warrior trilogy. (Sacred Journey of the Peaceful Warrior & The Hidden School) which you can purchase from Amazon if you’d like by clicking on their title.

Get the books from a library or buy them; either way it will be worth your while! I read both & thoroughly enjoyed them.

Happy Reading! I wish you well on your journey toward becoming a Peaceful Warrior.

6 Human Needs; Why all people do what they do

This post mainly comes from the ideas of the great Tony Robbins while I only add to it.

You are seeking emotions and experiences. After researching experts, I have found that there are six basic, universal needs that drive ALL human behavior. Every human being has these needs, but we each put different VALUE on these needs. Our focus on these needs will determine the direction of our life!  What need will you live for?

The six human needs include:

1) Certainty

2) Significance

3) Variety

4) Love/Connection

5) Growth

6) Contribution

Each of these needs influence every single human being’s life, and by understanding the needs that shape your behavior, you can take control of your life, and create new habits that lead you to the life you’ve been dreaming of living.

What do you think the most addictive thing in the world is???

Find out in a few paragraphs, it’s not what you think.

Before we get more into our human needs, lets look at how DECISIONS shape our destiny, and our decisions of course are intertwined with our needs.

Decision is the ultimate power. Decisions shape destiny.

There are 3 Decisions we are making EVERY moment of our lives:

1) What am I going to focus on?  Focus=feeling.  Past/present/Future…Self or others?

2) What does it(this situation/experience) mean? Is it the end or the beginning?  Are you being punished or rewarded?

3)What are your going to do? Are you going to give up or move forward?

We make these decisions consciously or unconsciously.**

Lance Armstrong for example could have focused on his cancer but he continued to focus on biking and being the best. He continued to win!

Rosa Parks.  Her focus was that she could change the world for her kids or grandkids instead of focusing on what she was told to do.  She wouldn’t go to the back of the bus & she changed the whole world!

Entrepreneur Tony Robbins also has an incredible story.  When he was a eleven years old with a very broke family and no food for Thanksgiving, a stranger came to his house on Thanksgiving to give them a turkey.  Tony’s angry father and himself had VERY different PERSPECTIVES/FOCUSES on this event that went like this:

Tony’s Father: His 3 decisions: Focus was “this is charity” What does it mean “I am worthless” What do I have to do? “Leave my family.” Which he did…

Tony’s focus:  There’s food!  What does it mean? “Strangers care about me and other people.”  What am I going to do?  “I’m going to do something to make a difference.” Six years later he started feeding families when he was 17. Slowly but surely he built a foundation and has fed millions of people all over the world.

Your FOCUS determines much of your life. Try to be intentional and conscious of what you focus on.

& The most addictive thing in the world is….

Most people will guess wrong. The answer is Problems.

**Most people find a way to feel significant by having a significant problem.  Problems are the safest way to connect with others and not be rejected. Problems are the biggest addiction in our culture.

And SiGNIFICANCE is one of the six human needs!!! Think about your life. Do you connect and feel significant through problems? And are you happy with constantly talking about problems or do you want to live a life with less complaining?

***Instead of just looking at peoples’ behaviors, see their attempts to meet their needs.***

A few insights into the 6 human needs:

1) Certainty

  • People like to be certain, to have financial security, to trust people and experiences. But too much certainty makes us bored, so we need some variety.

2) Variety

  • People like good surprises, if it’s a bad surprise they call it a problem.

3) Significance

  • We all need to feel important, special, unique..People do this in so many different ways-tattoos, religion, joining a group..etc..One of the quickest way some people feel significant is through Violence. Violent things happen each day, just watch the news; these people have a striving for significance, as well as some big mental problems..I encourage you to be significant in a positive way.  Join some great groups, read, write, travel.

4) What we really need is Connection & Love

  • Connection and love are like rain to a garden of flowers, they make us grow.  Surround yourself with people who support and love you. I am so thankful for my family because of their love. Also if you are feeling down and depressed, get a pet. Dogs will love you and are always happy to see you.  Cats are different, but they can show love to their owners as well.

Every human finds a way to meet the first 4 needs. What will your FOCUS be to meet these needs???

The next two needs create fulfillment!

5) Growth

If you don’t grow, you die. Relationships, businesses, self, etc.

  • We grow when we have something to give of value. So don’t always be thinking of yourself..I know it’s hard, but try to get out of yourself for awhile & see what you can give to others that can help them. EVERYONE has something great to contribute, but it can be very difficult to find it. Start by donating food or clothes, or doing something small for someone. It feels amazing and will help you grow. It’s funny how a selfless act will ultimately help you too.

6) To Contribute beyond ourselves

  • Growth and Contribution are intertwined. You grow by contributing.  Contribution=growth.

“The secret of living is giving.”

“It’s not about me, it’s about we.” Tony Robbins

People truly get excited to contribute once they experience it and not just talk about it.

We ALL have the same needs, but whatever need leads us will lead us to our destination.

People all try to meet the same needs, but we do it in different ways. A firefighter saves lives for significance while someone else kills a person for significance.

Try to appreciate how people are attempting to meet their needs, explore your decisions, and give.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO FOCUS ON?

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

Interview with Netflix Star from Last Chance U, Ronald Ollie

I had the pleasure of interviewing Ronald Ollie from Netflix’s new popular show, Last Chance U.  I was thrilled to have an opportunity to interview Ollie for many reasons.  Anyone who has seen the show knows that Ollie is a star.  I see the potential in Ollie and believe he will become a dominant player in the National Football League in upcoming years.  He is growing in character and skill, and is one of the most entertaining footballers in college football at the moment.

The show Last Chance U follows alongside coaches, players, games, and the entire 2015 football season of East Mississippi Community College (E.M.C.C.).  I hadn’t heard of this college before either, but if you are a fan of football in any way, you NEED to watch this show. You WILL enjoy it.  The combination of story development, pride, and vulnerability makes this documentary special.  I am not getting paid to promote this documentary by the way; it’s just really good!

Anyway here is my interview with Last Chance U’s Ronald Ollie:

Question 1: What do you look forward to most about playing for Nicholls State?

Ollie: “I look forward to growing more as a player and a teammate.”

Question 2: Did you always want to excel in football from a young age or did you have other goals/dreams & what were they?

Ollie: “No I didn’t.  Football was something that just happened, basketball was my thing.”

Question 3: If you could pick any team in the NFL to play for, who would it be any why?

Ollie: “Probably the Dolphins or Tampa Bay.  Or a team out in California just wanna see how beautiful the world really is.”

Question 4: Who is someone you look up to and why?

Ollie: “I don’t really look up to anybody but I do talk to God a lot to help me and guide me through things.”

Question 5: What was one of the most exciting times of your life?

Ollie: “One of the most exciting times of my life was winning a national championship in junior college.”

Ronald Ollie has had anything but an easy life, which you will find out when you watch the show.  But even through his pain and trials he shows up with a smile on his face and a passion for football like no other.  Follow his active twitter account @RonaldOllie.

I look forward to following Ollie, Nicholls State, E.M.C.C. and another season of Last Chance U when it airs again next year.

If you enjoyed this post and would like more posts like this please leave a like, comment and share.  Ronald Ollie is someone who should and will be known.

P.S. Here is a trailer for the documentary Last Chance U if you missed it above!