Author: Ken Thompson

Achieve Goals with Focus

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help, Success and tagged , , , , , , , .

My to-do list grows bigger and I start taking less action…

Am I the only one who gets distracted with all the “to-dos” and end up not getting anything done?

Sometimes I want to complete so many things that I end up completing nothing or going halfway on a task. This is when I remind myself to do less and Focus.

We are bombarded with numerous options every day of our lives. It can seem nice to have options but often the more options we have the more distracted we become.

So I ask myself, “What is a long-term goal I have and what do I need to do next to achieve it?”

I like this question but sometimes a clear answer doesn’t come to mind when I ask this. This is when Focus comes into play again.

At this point I think about a few things I could do to achieve my long-term goal. I might not be 100% sure about what to do but I choose an action whether it’s to write a blog post, create a video, work on social media, etc.

I follow one course until successful. I do it until it’s complete. And then I ask myself again, “What is a long-term goal I have and what do I need to do next to achieve it?”

What’s a long-term goal you have?

What actions are you taking to achieve it?

How Laughing Can Improve Your Life

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

“Ha. Ha. Ha.”

There are so many ways to pronounce the sounds: “ha ha ha.”

Do you say it with emphasis?

If so, where is your emphasis?

If not, well, that’s funny too.

Try it 5-10 times in different ways & tell me you aren’t feeling a little bit better.

It’s actually Science. 

More research is being done in this area but here are a few relative studies and part of their conclusions discussing how even simulated laughter increases positive feelings/endorphins.

—A study on how social laughter releases endorphins in the brain

—A couple studies showing that simulated laughter had positive effects on multiple aspects of health, including heart health. (First study)  (Second study)

A Study on combining simulated laughter and physical activity showed significant improvements in participants mental health, aerobic endurance, and self-efficacy for exercise.

So science shows that simulating laughter and even smiles can induce endorphins & positive feelings.

Guess who else thinks laughing is one of the most beneficial things anyone can do?

Like everyone. Literally. Well not literally, but check it out:

And after the quotes you can find a list of ways to simulate laughter into your life.

Don’t forget to laugh today!  🙂

“Nonsense wakes up the brain cells. And it helps develop a sense of humor, which is awfully important in this day and age. Humor has a tremendous place in this sordid world. It’s more than just a matter of laughing. If you can see things out of whack, then you can see how things can be in whack.”
Dr. Seuss

“As you proceed through life, following your own path, birds will shit on you. Don’t bother to brush it off. Getting a comedic view of your situation gives you spiritual distance. Having a sense of humor saves you.”
Joseph Campbell

 “With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.”
Abraham Lincoln

“Trouble knocked at the door, but, hearing laughter, hurried away.”
Benjamin Franklin

“There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.”
Charles Dickens

“I never would have made it if I could not have laughed. It lifted me momentarily out of this horrible situation, just enough to make it livable.”
Viktor Frankl

“Frame your mind to mirth and merriment
which bars a thousand harms
and lengthens life.”
William Shakespeare

“Humor is the great thing, the saving thing after all. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations, and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.”
Mark Twain

“When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky.”
Buddha

“Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.”
Horace

“I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t laugh.”
Maya Angelou

“There is little success where there is little laughter.”
Andrew Carnegie

“I’ve always thought that a big laugh is a really loud noise from the soul saying, ‘Ain’t that the truth.’”
 Quincy Jones

“Laughter is America’s most important export.”
Walt Disney

“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.”
Elbert Hubbard

“It is more fitting for a man to laugh at life than to lament over it.”
Lucius Annaeus Seneca

“The size of a man’s understanding can be justly measured by his mirth.”
Samuel Johnson

“If we couldn’t laugh, we would all going to go insane.”
Jimmy Buffett

“The child in you, like all children, loves to laugh, to be around people who can laugh at themselves and life. Children instinctively know that the more laughter we have in our lives, the better.”
Wayne Dyer

“A man isn’t poor if he can still laugh.”
Raymond Hitchcock

“You have as much laughter as you have faith.”
Martin Luther

“Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.”
George Bernard Shaw

“And the little prince broke into a lovely peal of laughter, which irritated me very much. I like my misfortunes to be taken seriously.”
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

“A good laugh overcomes more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than any other one thing.”
Laura Ingalls Wilder

“My focus is to forget the pain of life. Forget the pain, mock the pain, reduce it. And laugh.”
Jim Carrey

“If you would not be laughed at, be the first to laugh at yourself.”
Benjamin Franklin

“Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.”
Anthony Burgess

“It is cheerful to God when you rejoice or laugh from the bottom of your heart.”
Martin Luther King Jr.

“If you’re funny, if there’s something that makes you laugh, then every day’s going to be okay.”
Tom Hanks

“We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh.”
Agnes Repplier

“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.”
E. E. Cummings

“A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused.” Shirley MacClain

“Anyone who takes himself too seriously always runs the risk of looking ridiculous; anyone who can consistently laugh at himself does not.”
Vaclav Havel

“God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.”
Voltaire

“He deserves Paradise who makes his companions laugh.”
Koran

“As soon as you have made a thought, laugh at it.”
Lao Tsu

“From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.”
Dr. Seuss

“One can know a man from his laugh, and if you like a man’s laugh before you know anything of him, you may confidently say that he is a good man.”
Fyodor Dostoevsky

“Man, when you lose your laugh you lose your footing.”
Ken Kesey

“To make mistakes is human; to stumble is commonplace; to be able to laugh at yourself is maturity.”
William Arthur Ward

“What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul.”
Yiddish Proverb

“A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book.”
Irish Proverb

“You must learn to take life less seriously and to laugh.”
Maharishi Mahesh Yogi

“The greatest prayer you could ever pray is to laugh every day.”
Ramtha

“The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.” Bennett Cerf

“Don’t take yourself too seriously. Know when to laugh at yourself, and find a way to laugh at obstacles that inevitably present themselves.”
Halle Berry

“There’s power in looking silly and not caring that you do.”
Amy Poehler

“If you can’t laugh, you won’t make it.”
Jennifer Love Hewitt

“Fame comes and fame goes, but you have to be able to laugh about yourself and to take it with a grain of salt.”
Khloe Kardashian

“If you can’t laugh at yourself, you don’t deserve to laugh at anybody else.”
Charlie Murphy

“Nothing feels as good to me as laughing incredibly hard.”
Steve Carell

“Life is tough; and if you have the ability to laugh at it, you have the ability to enjoy it.”
Salma Hayek

“Sometimes you almost have to laugh to keep from crying to deal with the pain associated with the hood.”
Gucci Mane

“I surround myself with people who make me laugh.”
Allen Iverson

“I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It’s probably the most important thing in a person.”
Audrey Hepburn

“Wit is the key, I think, to anybody’s heart, because who doesn’t like to laugh?”
Julia Roberts

“It’s important to remember that life is a joke, and that outlook grants a lot of perspective, but I don’t think comedy should change and become political due to other things. It should just laugh at that cosmic joke that life is all the time.” John Mulaney

“Laughter is a bodily exercise, precious to health.”
Aristotle

“The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.”
Mark Twain

“He that is of a merry heart has a continual feast.”
Proverbs 15:15

“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 18:3

“Anything with the power to make you laugh over thirty years later isn’t a waste of time. I think something like that is very close to immortality.”
Stephen King

“If you become silent after your laughter, one day you will hear God also laughing, you will hear the whole existence laughing — trees and stones and stars with you.”
Osho

“The point is seeing that THIS — the immediate, everyday and present experience — is IT, the entire and ultimate point for the existence of a universe. I believe that if this state of consciousness could become more universal, the pretentious nonsense which passes for the serious business of the world would dissolve in laughter… “
Alan Watts

“Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.”
Mark Twain

Ways to create and simulate laughter

“When you are totally depressed, you should try giggling. Just make yourself laugh. Force yourself to laugh.”
Yoko Ono

**Smile for 5 minutes

**Surround yourself with positive and fun people

**Count your blessings

**Watch funny videos/Read funny stories & jokes
(Rodney Dangerfield jokes below)

**Schedule time for fun activities

**Bring humor into conversations
(Ask someone “what’s the funniest thing that has ever happened to you?”)

**Go to a laughter yoga class
(I went to a few of these in college and it was awesome!)

*Remember funny things that have happened recently

**Remember fun times from your childhood

**Laugh at yourself.

**Remind self to laugh

**Laugh every day! 🙂

“Whenever I want to laugh, I read a wonderful book, ‘Children’s Letters to God.’ You can open it anywhere. One I read recently said, ‘Dear God, thank you for the baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy.’”
Maya Angelou

Some quite funny Rodney Dangerfield’s jokes:

“I asked my old man if I could go ice-skating on the lake. He told me, ‘Wait til it gets warmer.’”

“I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.”

“Last Halloween a kid tried to rip my face off. He thought it was a mask. Now it’s different when I open the door the kids hand me candy.”

“My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.”

“My uncle’s dying wish was to have me sitting on his lap. He was in the electric chair.”

“One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I’ll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went to Florida.”

“My wife isn’t very bright. The other day she was at the store, and just as she was heading for our car, someone stole it! I said, ‘Did you see the guy that did it?’ She said, ‘No, but I got the license plate.’”

“I tell you, with my doctor, I don’t get no respect. I told him, ‘I’ve swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills.’ He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.”

“I had a lot of pimples too. One day I fell asleep in a library. I woke up and a blind man was reading my face.”

“A travel agent told I could spend 7 nights in HAWAII no days just nights.”

What is something that makes you laugh? 🙂

How to Succeed Through Failure

Posted on by in Lifestyle, Motivation, Self-Help, Success, Successful People and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Vincent Van Gogh, Michael Jordan, Thomas Edison, Stephen King, J.K. Rowling, Albert Einstein, Walt Disney, Steven Spielberg, Dr. Seuss, Oprah, Steve Jobs, Elvis Presley, Mark Cuban, and just about every other successful person.

What do all these people have in common?

Failure. Rejections. People doubting them.

But they also had & have perseverance & belief in their vision.

coacht.blog Van Gogh Quote.png

It’s more than a mindset.
It’s a pull.

Life pulls people toward their destiny but few people listen to life.

“Be in the world but not of the world.”

The world tells you to settle. 

Life, the infinite, gives you signs of what you should do—your passions, hobbies, interests, etc.

But the world tells you you can’t do that as a career.
They tell you you’ll fail.

And you will. At first.
But in time you will succeed.

“Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement. One fails forward toward success.”
C.S. Lewis

• J.K. Rowling’s original Harry Potter book was rejected 12 times before it was accepted.

• Dr. Suess’s first book was rejected 28 times before it was accepted.

• Stephen King’s first book, Carrie, was rejected by 30 publishers before it was accepted.

• Oprah was told she wasn’t fit to be on television. 

• Steve Jobs was fired from the company that HE CREATED!

• Thomas Edison talks about failing over 10,000 times.

• Walt Disney experienced bankruptcy and a mental breakdown

• Vincent Van Gogh only sold ONE painting during his lifetime…He made over 900 paintings.

They never gave up because their purpose was never about “money.”

They “failed” over, and over, and over again, and again, and again.

Or maybe they just found a lot of ways that didn’t work.

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
Thomas Edison

“I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is a step forward.”
Thomas A. Edison

The world laughed at them. And they will laugh at you if you try to attempt anything great, anything outside the “norm.”

Laugh with them. It is funny. And it will be even more funny when you make it, because it’s not about the critics and it’s not even about you. Your life’s work has a deeper purpose. It is life living through you.
It is Love.

As you begin to follow your life’s purpose, and it is hard in the beginning when you are experiencing failures, but the pull toward your purpose will grow within you. Your vision will be tested but your belief in it will grow as you persevere through the difficult times.

“Gold is tested by fire, and human character is tested in the furnace of humiliation.”
Sirach 2:5-7

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.”
J.K. Rowling

Don’t fear failure. Fear never trying.

A research study found that one of the top 5 things a person on their deathbeds regrets is never living a life true to themselves.

More inspiring quotes to help you persevere through failure:

“The phoenix must burn to emerge.”
 Janet Fitch

“You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. It is good to have a failure while you’re young because it teaches you so much. For one thing it makes you aware that such a thing can happen to anybody, and once you’ve lived through the worst, you’re never quite as vulnerable afterward.”
Walt Disney

“Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.”
Dale Carnegie

“Failure after long perseverance is much grander than never to have a striving good enough to be called a failure.”
George Eliot

“Failure is success if we learn from it.”
Malcolm Forbes

“You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don’t try to forget the mistakes, but you don’t dwell on it. You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.”
Johnny Cash

“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit.”
Napoleon Hill

“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.”
Steve Jobs

“I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying.”
Michael Jordan

“Women, like men, should try to do the impossible. And when they fail, their failure should be a challenge to others.”
Amelia Earhart

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.”
Robert F. Kennedy

“Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely.”
Henry Ford

“Remember that failure is an event, not a person.”
Zig Ziglar

“Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stepping stone to greatness.”
Oprah Winfrey

“It is fine to celebrate success, but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure.”
Bill Gates

“Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.”
Winston Churchill

“Success is never final, failure is never fatal. It’s courage that counts.”
John Wooden

“Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.”
Dale Carnegie

“Failure is so important. We speak about success all the time. It is the ability to resist failure or use failure that often leads to greater success. I’ve met people who don’t want to try for fear of failing.”
J.K. Rowling

Doubt Breeds REAL Confidence

Posted on by in Lifestyle, Motivation, Self-Help, Success and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

“If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties.”

Francis Bacon

Have you ever been so confident in something & then ended up wrong?
I have. 

I’ve tried to put together a small table without following the directions & after failing I finally decided to use the directions.

An ignorant confidence does that to us all. Blind faith is easy.

Over the years I have learned that I know nothing for sure. I am confident in that and so I can live confidently, forever learning. Confident in trying something so many times, and failing, until I can do it with complete confidence.

Confidence is a great trait to have in all aspects of life, but HOW you gain that confidence is more important than “confidence” itself.

In a world that praises fake confidence & bravado, why and how can you use doubt to breed REAL confidence?

“The dumbest people I know are those who know it all.”
Malcolm Forbes

Remain humble —You stop learning when you are confident in “knowing it all:”

“Men cease to think when they think they know it all.”
Horace

“The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
Stephen Hawking

Doubt can help you improve.
It’s a sign that there is something to learn, always.

Instead of having blind confidence in whatever it is you’re doing, question it & LEARN.

Do you follow directions when building things like tables for the first time?
I do now. Doubt guides me to follow the directions because I doubt I can build a table without directions if I’ve never done it before.

So why can’t we apply this idea to other aspects of life?

We can.

We can question things & look for answers until we learn what we need to to succeed & grow in that area. 

And no matter what there’s always more to learn!

Doubt allows you to think critically and opens your mind.

“If someone can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in any thought or action, I shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone: the harm is to persist in one’s own self-deception and ignorance.” 
Marcus Aurelius

Having doubt will prepare you for anything you anticipate. Soldiers train every day to stay ready for battle, because if they had 100% confidence without training, they would fail. Doubt is a guide for them, as it is with all people.

“The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize.”
Robert Hughes

People who doubt are preparing themselves for the future, which is today. (Yesterday the future was today…)

“If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.”
René Descartes

Some people don’t want to be wrong in the fear of looking stupid. That is stupidity in itself.

“The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence.”
Charles Bukowski

“The less people know, the more stubbornly they know it.”
Rajneesh

Ignorance is NOT bliss.

Doubt is a good thing.

It will lead you to a REAL, humble confidence.

Doubt will keep you learning and growing throughout all of your days.

“Uncertainty also relieves us of our judgment of ourselves. Then we don’t know if we’re lovable or not; we don’t know how attractive we are; we don’t know how successful we could potentially become. The only way to achieve these things is to remain uncertain of them and be open to finding them out through experience. Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth. As the old adage goes, the man who believes he knows everything learns nothing. We cannot learn anything without first not knowing something.” 
Mark Manson

“Always be suspicious of those who pretend to know it all, claim their way is the best way and are willing to force their way on the rest of us.”
Walter Williams

“The only thing I know is that I know nothing.”
Socrates

I can agree with Socrates in saying that I also know nothing.

You don’t need to fight doubt. It’s there for a reason.

Allow doubt to prepare you and guide you to real confidence.

It’s okay to not know

Posted on by in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

I was in my senior year of high school when I was asked for the millionth time by another “adult:” “What are you going to major in?”

I had no idea. Later that evening I was talking to my dad & I asked him what he thought I should major in. I’m sure he gave me some ideas but what I vividly remember from that conversation is him telling me that it’s also okay if I don’t know right now.

“It’s okay to not know.”

That answer seemed somewhat surprising after numerous teachers & “adults” spoke of how important it was to know what you were going to major in.

This advice gave me a huge sense of relief and I still use it today in a number of situations.

I went into college with no major, undeclared, for my first 2 years, then I actually had to decide.

I chose based off of what my interests were, not off of what would make me the most money, and I am happy with my choices. I have a degree in Sport Management, a minor in Business, and a Masters of Education degree.

coacht.blog college degree

I wasn’t worried about the future when I entered college undeclared.

“Know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.”
Mary Schmich

My focus was on the day at hand. My focus was to live life to the fullest while completing everything needed to graduate.

I knew that it was okay to not try to know exactly how my future would pan out, but to trust it would turn out well, and I took actions based on that faith, like this quote from Alan Watts:

 “To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don’t grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float.” 

But it can be easy to get caught up in worrying about the countless tasks you need to complete. I do that sometimes, but when I know I’m worrying I remind myself to focus on what I can do to return to peace of mind. 

Worry can be a motivator to get things done, but it can be a cage as well. Uncertainty lives with all of us, every single day. It’s always there, like gravity. How will you deal with it?

“The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty that you can comfortably live with.”
Tony Robbins

So it’s completely okay to not know.

“The only thing I know is that I know nothing.”
Socrates

But what happens when you really want to know?

You want to know the answer.
You want to know what to do.
You want to know what will happen.

You want certainty in uncertain things and there are ways to create some certainty during uncertain times.

There are ways to create some certainty during uncertain times.

—One way is to dwell in the idea that life is working out in everyone’s best interest, even during down times. And if you’re constantly hating your job then that could be life telling you to quit & find work that you enjoy.

—The second way is to focus on making progress.
If you really want to “grab life by the horns” and take control of your life, progress is key. You might feel stuck at a job you hate or lost in what you think you should do.

How can you make progress?

—Begin by asking yourself “what does my ideal life look like?”

Think about ideals in a variety of aspects in your life: Financial, relationships, career, hobbies, environment, etc.

This is the time to let go of any limiting beliefs you have and raise your standards. 

Even if you don’t believe you can have your ideal life just pretend for a moment and think about what it would look like.

—Know your “why.”

Why do you want your ideal life? Think about all your reasons. It could be for your happiness, to provide for your family, to start a charity, to buy a new car, etc.

—Take Action

Begin taking action toward your ideal life. Your reasons for making it happen will grow stronger from here.

Uncertainty surrounds us every day.

How will you make the most of it?

Quotes!

“The root of suffering is resisting the certainty that no matter what the circumstances, uncertainty is all we truly have.”
 Pema Chödrön

“We absolutely must leave room for doubt or there is no progress and there is no learning. There is no learning without having to pose a question. And a question requires doubt. People search for certainty. But there is no certainty. People are terrified — how can you live and not know? It is not odd at all. You only think you know, as a matter of fact. And most of your actions are based on incomplete knowledge and you really don’t know what it is all about, or what the purpose of the world is, or know a great deal of other things. It is possible to live and not know.”
Richard Feynman

“There are many things of which we are completely unaware—in fact, there are things of which we are so unaware, we don’t even know we are unaware of them.”
Donald Rumsfeld

“Suspecting and knowing are not the same.”
Rick Riordan

“People don’t know that they don’t know. Remember that before you hold it against them.”
Akiroq Brost

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.”
Gilda Radner

“A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.”
William Shakespeare

“Everything you’ve learned in school as “obvious” becomes less and less obvious as you begin to study the universe. For example, there are no solids in the universe. There’s not even a suggestion of a solid. There are no absolute continuums. There are no surfaces. There are no straight lines.”
Richard Buckminster Fuller

“Beyond all sciences, philosophies, theologies, and histories, a child’s relentless inquiry is truly all it takes to remind us that we don’t know as much as we think we know.”
Criss Jami

The Question IS The Answer

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help, Success and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Will this article make you smarter?

Questions. Questions. Questions.

Everyone is looking for answers. No one is looking for questions.

But the answer is within the question.

Research has been done by scientists on the power questions have on human brains.

Questions trigger a reflex in humans know as “instinctive elaboration,” which means when someone asks you a question, the question takes over the brain’s thought process. 

Behavioral scientists Morwitz, Johnson, and Schmittlein did a study on this topic and found that asking people questions about their futures significantly influenced their decisions. This is known as the “mere measurement effect.” The study was done in 1993 with over 40,000 participants by asking them if they were going to purchase a new car within six months. This question increased their purchase rates by 35%.

Similar surveys have been done on the topics of voting, donating blood, exercise frequency, and more. 

Each survey found that all these behaviors can be increased by asking about them!

Your mind is powerful!

Research has found that the more the brain thinks about a certain behavior, the more likely it is that you will do it.

Thinking about something can change your behavior and sensations.

Imagine sipping some warm hot chocolate. 

Can you taste it? 

Can you notice your mind shifted its focus from where it was to the hot chocolate?

Your mind is powerful…

So if you never ask a question, you will never get an answer.

If you ask a negative question like, “why do bad things always happen to me?” You will get an answer, and it will reinforce bad things happening to you.

If you ask a positive question like, “how can I live my best life?” You will get an answer and it will reinforce ideas of how you can live your best life.

Questions are powerful tools you can use to live more of the life you want to live.

Here are some others who strongly agree:

“Problems that remain persistently insoluble should always be suspected as questions asked in the wrong way.”
Alan Watts

“Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.”
Tony Robbins

“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”
Voltaire

“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.”
Eugene Ionesco

“Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”
Rainer Maria Rilke

“One of the many qualities that separate self-made billionaires from the rest of us is their ability to ask the right questions.”
Justine Musk

“Always the beautiful answer who asks a more beautiful question.”
E. E. Cummings

“If you do not know how to ask the right question, you discover nothing.”
W. Edwards Deming

“Life is an unanswered question, but let’s still believe in the dignity and importance of the question.”
Tennessee Williams

“I think that probably the most important thing about our education was that it taught us to question even those things we thought we knew.”
Thabo Mbeki

“He must be very ignorant for he answers every question he is asked.”
Voltaire

“A wise man’s question contains half the answer.”
Solomon Ibn Gabirol

“A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.”
Francis Bacon

7 powerful questions Tony Robbins asks to spark positive emotions are:

—What am I happy about in my life now?

—What am I excited about in my life now?

—What am I proud about in my life now?

—What am I grateful about in my life now?

—What am I enjoying in life right now?

—What am I committed to in my life right now?

—Who do I love? Who loves me?

What are 3 other questions you can think of that by asking yourself them will help you achieve a goal?

In All Things, Use what Works for You

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“Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.”

Bruce Lee

How often have you been told what to do with your life?

Most people who give you unsolicited advice have good intentions but it doesn’t mean that what has worked for them will work for you.

“Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”
Paulo Coelho

It’s easy to get lost in all the things you “should do,” as people will tell you, while forgetting about what you actually want to do.

It can be extremely difficult when it seems like everyone else is doing what people say you “should do”, like going to college, but it’s not for everyone.

Here are some people who didn’t go or dropped out of college:

Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, Ted Turner, Tony Robbins, Richard Branson, Ellen DeGeneres, Rachael Ray, Michael Dell, Jack Dorsey, Russell Simmons, John D. Rockefeller, Henry Ford, and many others. Find a list of 100 here.

Remember this quote from Mark Twain whenever you are thinking that you should be doing what others are doing:

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

If you’re struggling in an area where you see others succeeding in, it doesn’t make you dumb, it just tells you that that area is not for you, unless you’re passionate about it. You can learn & master any skill you want through relentless practice.

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” 
Albert Einstein

A variety of life experiences & hobbies can help you figure out your passion.

Maybe it’s writing, acting, speaking, athletics, designer, teacher, attendant, horse trainer.

But people say, “you can’t do that, no one makes money doing that.”

Except they do…

If there is anyone doing what you would love to do, you can do it too.

You may have to take some side jobs as you focus on getting paid to do what you love, but if you are passionate enough about it, you will find a way.

“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.”
Steve Jobs

You are unique.

People find the most happiness when they embrace their uniqueness instead of trying to please people & fit in.

Maybe you learn best visually while someone else learns best verbally.
Or aurally, physically, logically, socially, or solitary.

Which way is best? 

There is no “best.” There is only what is best for you.

Find out how you learn best & don’t judge yourself.

I think I learn best visually—I like demonstrations especially when I am able to get involved.

“Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.”
Benjamin Franklin

There are many crossroads in life, leaving you with multiple choices. The easy path is to follow what others are doing.

A nurse who spent years working in palliative care, taking care of people in the last 12 weeks of their lives, researched and wrote the top five regrets people have on their deathbeds.

The most common regret was “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Find the article here.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Use what works for you, not what works for someone else.

Here are 3 more ways to live life you won’t regret

Quotes to help find and follow your bliss

“You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don’t make money your goal. Instead pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you.”
Maya Angelou

“If it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, go out and sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures. Sweep streets like Handel and Beethoven composed music. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and say, here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.

“The people who make it to the top – whether they’re musicians, or great chefs, or corporate honchos – are addicted to their calling … [they] are the ones who’d be doing whatever it is they love, even if they weren’t being paid.”
Quincy Jones

“There comes a time when you ought to start doing what you want. Take a job that you love. You will jump out of bed in the morning. I think you are out of your mind if you keep taking jobs that you don’t like because you think it will look good on your resume. Isn’t that a little like saving up sex for your old age?”
Warren Buffet

“I think the foremost quality – there’s no success without it – is really loving what you do. If you love it, you do it well, and there’s no success if you don’t do well what you’re working at.”
Malcolm Forbes

“When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bounds. Your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. Dormant forces, faculties and talents become alive, and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.”
Patanjali

“The law of work seems unfair, but nothing can change it; the more enjoyment you get out of your work, the more money you will make.”
Mark Twain

“Everyone has been made for some particular work, and the desire for that work has been put in every heart.”
Rumi

“Yes, I’ve made a great deal of dough from my fiction, but I never set a single word down on paper with the thought of being paid for it … I have written because it fulfilled me. Maybe it paid off the mortgage on the house and got the kids through college, but those things were on the side—I did it for the buzz. I did it for the pure joy of the thing. And if you can do it for the joy, you can do it forever.”
Stephen King

“I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: ‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer has been ‘No’ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”
Steve Jobs

Stop Looking Back & Live Life like you’re Driving

Posted on by in Lifestyle, Motivation, Self-Help, Success and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

I was driving on the highway yesterday as I adjusted my rearview mirror to the honking car behind me. I kept my eyes on the rearview mirror for too long and crashed, totaling my car and injuring my body.

This is a metaphor but very real in that it happens to people every day; you look back for too long, dwelling in the pain of the past as it becomes a habit & nearly impossible to look forward.

What happens when you look back for too long?
You crash.

It’s important to look back every now & then so that you can shift lanes & stay cautious without getting in an accident. Caution is important to moving forward, but too much caution will keep you where you are.

Sometimes by looking back you are just stalling. Sitting. Waiting…Waiting for something to happen, but nothing does, because YOU are the driver. YOU decide where you go.

But it can be difficult to look forward when this ruthless world is quick to punish…

…Especially when you find success.

When you find success you’ll find a crowd of cars tailing you, honking at you, craving your attention. They want you to look back. They don’t want you to follow your vision & move forward. They want you to remember all the pot holes you hit on your way.

How are you responding to the world around you?

Everyone & everything wants your attention. 

Are you giving it to them?

Or are you following YOUR vision?

You are the driver of your life. You are empowered.

Keep looking forward and I’ll see you on the highway.

Quotes on not looking back

“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.”
Helen Keller

“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.”
C.S. Lewis

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.”
Albert Einstein

“The great courageous act that we must all do, is to have the courage to step out of our history and past so that we can live our dreams.”
Oprah Winfrey

“We are products of our past, but we don’t have to be prisoners of it.”
Rick Warren

“If you want to live your life in a creative way, as an artist, you have to not look back too much. You have to be willing to take whatever you’ve done and whoever you were and throw them away.”
Steve Jobs

“Never look back unless you are planning on going that way.”
Henry David Thoreau

“If you look back, you’ll soon be going that way.”
Proverb

“We ought not to look back, unless it is to derive useful lessons from past errors and for the purpose of profiting by dear bought experience.”
George Washington

“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.”
Steve Maraboli

“I feel confident imposing change on myself. It’s a lot more fun progressing than looking back.”
David Bowie

“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.”
Mother Theresa

Here are 3 things you can do to live a life you won’t regret living!

Let Memento Mori Inspire You

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“Memento Mori” means to keep in mind that you will die.

2,000 years ago it was popular for Roman generals to keep this idea in mind. 

As generals paraded around their cities in horse led chariots after victorious battles, they kept aides behind them to whisper into their ears, “Memento Mori.”

Generals knew the fleetingness of life and wanted to keep the reminder close by so that their egos didn’t get the best of them. It’s easy for our ego to inflate and make us believe we are bigger than death, especially after achieving success. So it is a humble reminder to remember your death. To remember that you, and everyone around you, is going to die.

Skull-of-a-Skeleton-768x1018.jpg

A Memento Mori painting by Vincent Van Gogh

Many artists, philosophers, and rulers have used “Memento Mori” to inspire them.

Instead of letting the idea of death scare them, as many do, they used it to create urgency and a deeper perspective, seeing life as a gift and not as suffering.

You’ve probably heard of people who have experienced a near death experience and came out of it with a new inspiration for living fully. You don’t need a near death experience to change your life. “Memento Mori” can be your inspiration and guide to living a full life.

 

Here are some famous names of the past who were inspired by the reminder of death, Memento Mori:

“Of all the footprints, that of the elephant is supreme. Similarly, of all mindfulness meditation, that on death is supreme.”
Buddha

“Every third thought shall be my grave.”
William Shakespeare

“Philosophy is “about nothing else but dying and being dead.”
Socrates

“To practice death is to practice freedom. A man who has learned how to die has unlearned how to be a slave.”
Michel de Montaigne

“People who are excited by posthumous fame forget that the people who remember them will soon die too. And those after them in turn. Until their memory, passes from one to another like a candle flame, gutters and goes out.”
Marcus Aurelius

“So this is how a thoughtful person should await death: not with indifference, not with impatience, not with disdain, but simply viewing it as one of the things that happens to us. Now you anticipate the child’s emergence from its mother’s womb; that’s how you should await the hour when your soul will emerge from its compartment.”
Marcus Aurelius

“Stop whatever you’re doing for a moment and ask yourself: Am I afraid of death because I won’t be able to do this anymore?”
Marcus Aurelius

Find more Marcus Aurelius ideas on death & other subjects here

 

vanity-philippe-de-champaigne.jpg

Vanity Painting by Philippe de Champaigne

 

The reminder of death still inspires many modern day entrepreneurs, artists, and others:

“There’s something coming for all of us. It’s called death. Rather than fearing it, it can become one of our greatest counselors. So, if this was the last week of your life, what would you cherish most? How would you live? How would you love? What truth would you tell today?”
Tony Robbins

“It’s easy to lose track of that mortality, to forget time, to think that you’re going to live forever. The idea that you’re gonna die and that life is short is only depressing if you’re thinking about it wrong. If you’re thinking about it right it should give you a sense of priority. It should even give you a sense of meaning; it should let you know what’s important, what you’re trying to do while you’re here on this planet.”
Ryan Holiday

“The reason I believe in it(death as motivation) is because it’s ultimately practical. It’s the guiding light and the fire and ambition that drives me toward legacy and living my best life.”
Gary Vaynerchuk

 

Will you look death in the face?

Are you ready to let death inspire you?

Do it and see how your life changes for the better…

Memento Mori

 

 

 

 

 

Replace your FOMO with JOMO

Posted on by in Motivation, Self-Help and tagged , , , , , , .

The “Joy Of Missing Out” 

FOMO or, the “Fear Of Missing Out,” has been commonly used in this modern social media age.

It’s easy to pull out your smart phone and look at all the wonderful things everyone else seems to be doing, while you are sitting on your living room couch, or better yet, sitting on your parent’s living room couch.

You see all the amazing things people are doing and start thinking that you’re missing out. 

You may be missing out on that specific experience you are observing on social media, but there are even better experiences for you to be had.

So how can you turn your FOMO into JOMO?

The Joy Of Missing Out will build in your life when you create experiences in your life that bring you joy.

It seems simple but most people aren’t creating those experiences!

Instead of focusing on what others are doing and what you “should” be doing, focus on being content with where you are in this moment, and continue to create experiences that bring you joy.

—First ask yourself, “What brings me joy?”

(Nature, music, social gatherings, sports, languages, art, knitting, etc, etc, etc!)

—Second, be intentional with your time. Ask yourself, “What do I have to do to bring more of these joyful experiences into my life?”

(You may have to get out of your comfort zone to join a new group, or buy materials to build or create something.)

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”
Neale Donald Walsch

—Third, get comfortable with saying “No.” 

(When someone asks you to do something you don’t want to do, say no. It’s natural to want to help others, but it’s okay to care about yourself too.)

“I used to be afraid when people used to say ‘oh she’s so full of herself.’ And now I embrace it. I consider it a compliment that I am full of myself. Because only when you’re full, I’m full, I’m overflowing. My cup runneth over. I have so much to offer and so much to give and I am not afraid of honoring myself.” 
Oprah Winfrey

—Fourth, get away from all technology and momentarily live only with your surroundings.

(There is a deep peace you can find by intentionally not using any technology for some time.)

Fear missing out on moments that would actually bring YOU joy, not experiences that others are having on social media.

When you are feeling the FOMO, remember the important aspects of your life. Your family, good friends, good times, deep talks, travels, the moments that bring you a deep joy. 

These are the moments we all should be wanting more of.

Let’s all JOMO a little more, and FOMO a little less.